I feel for you! I too sometimes feel self-conscious about being pale while everybody else is bathing in self-tanners.. I just think it's a trend.. What really catches my attention (in a bad way) is those chicks who go ORANGE.. I'm all for being pale (although I do enjoy a sun bath once in a while)! It does remind me of the victorian era, the princesses in the big fluffy dresses, etc I think it look really classy and can give off a romantic vibe..
That being said, if everybody seems to tell you that you look like a cadaver, you gotta stop and think, are they just hating, or do I have a health problem? Some people will never understand somebody who's different, so their opinion shouldn't matter.. BUT you also have to be reasonable and ask yourself, is it normal that I'm this pale? I know some vegetarians that don't eat right and they're not just naturally pale, they look GREEN, like cadavers! I believe it might have to do with health too... So be reasonable and if you're reasonably pale, then I don't think you have anything to worry about. In that pic you certainly don't look like a cadaver, you look like a normal white girl!
As for foundation shades, I've recently discovered that a lot of Mineral makeup brands have really, really PALE shades available. For example, whenever I used to buy my usual Lancome Teint Idole liquid foundation, or any other liquid foundation for that matter, I usually pick the lightest shade.. and even that sometimes is too dark for me... When I did the same with my Alima foundation purchase, and picked the lightest shade, to my surprise that shade was like paper-white on me! I would have never imagined that I could actually find something so white. Also, if you want to stick with whatever your favorite brand is for foundation, I'd still recommend buying a jar of pale mineral foundation, that way you'll be able to mix it in without a problem! It's pretty cheap too!