# 17 and never had a boyfriend



## chivita (Dec 20, 2006)

so i'm 17 and i've never had a boyfriend or kissed a boy. i know it sounds stupid but its really making me feel awful and unappealing and i cant stand it. i try and remind myself just to wait --i often feel more mature then people my age anyway but I cant help but feel so upset about it. The guy i like is now in college and might like me back but I cant really tell...i feel like this is stuff younger kids go through


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## sarahgr (Dec 20, 2006)

I used to feel the exact same way you did...!!...One thing you shouldnt do is just find some random person to hook up just to do it...

i know this sounds completely cheesy...but when the time is right you will find someone...in the meantime...be confident (not cocky..lol)...when you are confident in yourself it shows...otherwise it can make you seem inapproachable even though you dont intend it to  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />....love yourself first...


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## mehrunissa (Dec 20, 2006)

Haha, don't feel bad. I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 20. We all come into these things in our own time. Don't stress out over it, and go at your own pace. I don't think I could have handled being in a genuine, loving relationship before 20. Actually, I don't think I would've even recognized it for that at 20!


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## girl_geek (Dec 20, 2006)

I agree, don't feel bad! It's much better to be single than to date a bad guy just to have a boyfriend!

I didn't have a boyfriend until I started college at age 18, and we dated for almost a year but still never kissed! He was very conservative when it came to getting physical  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> The first (and only) guy I kissed was my hubby, at age 22! And I wouldn't have it any other way!  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## missnadia (Dec 20, 2006)

That's true... I did and I really regret it now... I didn't have a real boyfriend that I cared for until I was 19-20. It's normal, be proud that you have some standards and that you don't settle for the first guy!!! And don't worry, when you're with a guy who cares for you and respects you, he wouldn't mind that you don't have any experience!! Chances are he will even feel special that you chose him to be your first :icon_wink


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## Aquilah (Dec 20, 2006)

Sweetie, I wouldn't worry about it! My husband was 19 before he had a "real" girlfriend! I know a guy who is 30 and he's never had one (he's really shy). Don't worry, as I'm sure God has a plan for you... They always come around when you least expect it too!


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## chivita (Dec 20, 2006)

wow i am overwhelmed by responces. i assumed this would be brushed off as a superficial teenage problem but it really does impact future relationships.

i have considered random hook-ups but i'm glad i've held back so far


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## pinkbundles (Dec 20, 2006)

aww, don't feel bad! i didn't have my first kiss til i was 17 and a bf til i was 18. i get how you feel though. it feels like it's never going to happen! but it will and def. in college if it hasn't happened by then!


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## sarahgr (Dec 20, 2006)

Its not superficial at all...You should keep holding back...you will regret it later on...not saying you can't be around boys ...lol...just be sure before doing anything...maybe you should treat yourself to some new clothes, makeup or a spa treatment with a girlfriend or just do something to feel nice...it helps a bit sometimes  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## Dragonfly (Dec 20, 2006)

Everyone is giving great advice! I especially like Missnadia's post.

While you are single, watch what other girls go through.

Some will make mistakes and others will settle.

If you notice these things happening to you (once you start dating),

remember your friend's mistakes so you don't have to learn the hard way.

You mentioned a boy in college - I'm 42 and can't always tell if a man likes me or not.

Our intuition doesn't always inprove with age unfortunately.

Have fun living your life. When you are meant to meet your boyfriend, you will.

The only regrets I have are the casual hook ups that meant nothing.


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## Retro-Violet (Dec 20, 2006)

i was 18 when i had my first boyfriend, and was 17 when i had my first kiss (although i dont really count it since the guy was drunk and was running up to girls and frenching them at this party i was at).


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## lummerz (Dec 20, 2006)

Don't feel so bad..i used to have a bf at 16 but glad nothing came of that cuz he ended up cheating on me and getting married on me and never told me. Bastard! Now he's unhappy and hates his life...hooray! But nevertheless...all i am saying is that guys are completely immature and you'd wanna wait anyway...i wish i did cuz that time in my life..was extremely difficult for me.


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## pretty_pink13 (Dec 20, 2006)

Its totally okay IMO to not have a bf or kissed at that age. you should be proud of yourself, the time will come trust me. I didn't have a serious relationship til i was 20. Its totally okay!!!


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## sarahgr (Dec 20, 2006)

Lol...good for you that you didnt end up with him...karma is a *****


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## lummerz (Dec 20, 2006)

Karma is Shitty? F***! M-F***! I have a difficult time reading astericks!  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />

No..but the irony to all of that..he's my roommate..Muahahaha


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## sarahgr (Dec 20, 2006)

Lol...i meant the other name for a female woof!...bitc*

The others work good too though...

And omg,...lol...thats freakin hilarious


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## LVA (Dec 20, 2006)

17 is still young. U have nothing to worri about  /emoticons/wink[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> The right guy will come along one day. I was in your shoe once and i swear, i thought i'd grow up old and lonely ... and one day ... i found my guy  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## StrangerNMist (Dec 20, 2006)

It's best to wait and not jump into things quickly, especially when it comes to relationships. Girls may mature, but boys will be boys from here to eternity! (Almost, lol!) As of right now, there are very few young men out there who are mature enough to handle any sort of relationship that comes their way.

Enjoy your youth, and don't worry it away by waiting for your first kiss / boyfriend.

When you stop looking for something, that something that you want the most ends up coming you're way, and it'll come when you're ready.

*Bear Hugz*


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## michal_cohen (Dec 20, 2006)

ditto

i had my first bf when i was 18

my first kiss was on my 16 years birthday and i even didnt want it

so i think your first time will be great

caz you can do everything in the first time with someone you love

and he loves you back

its worth waiting belive me


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## princess_20 (Dec 20, 2006)

sweety dont worry! The right guy will come along in the right day

i had my first bf when i was 17 like u

and we are still together

so be patience!


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## Mod_squad (Dec 20, 2006)

that was similar to me. My first kiss a week shy of my 17th birthday. we pashed, he tried to put his hands down my pants so i pushed him off me. he then went to kiss my friend, and it was also her first kiss...


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## Lia (Dec 20, 2006)

Haha, don't worry. I'm 18, almost 19, and never ever been kissed. Ah, and i'm already on 3rd year of med school, so it's life. My sis had her 1st boyfriend when she was only 17.


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## KimC2005 (Dec 21, 2006)

I didn't have my 1st serious boyfriend until I was 18. Even then I dont think I was completely ready for a serious relationship. When you least expect it is when you will find a guy and when you aren't looking for it. I never believed that until it actually happened to me. When I completely just let go of it and learned to be okay with myself thats when guys started coming around more.


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## dixiewolf (Dec 21, 2006)

I was 18 before I had a bf, and it wasnt an intimate one. 19 was problably my first one. I probably wouldnt have been ready for one before then. I was in college when I started dating.


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## rejectstar (Dec 21, 2006)

Honestly, you should think any less of yourself just because you're single! If anything you should be proud of your independence  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> I used to worry about not having a boyfriend, because all my other friends were dating and I felt like a big loser, LOL.

When I was 15 I naively got together with the first guy that actually paid attention to me, which I now realize was a mistake. We only lasted maybe 3 months, and it was a lot of unessesary hearbreak and drama. After I broke up with him I pretty much resigned myself to the belief that I'd never have another boyfriend, and be lonely for the rest of my life. I had no interest in guys and just gave up looking or caring.

But not too long after, right when I thought I'd never be with anyone again, I started getting to know this guy... and within a few months, he asked me to be his girlfriend. And we've been together ever since! [over 2.5 years, now  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />]. When you finally give up, stop looking and let things take their natural course, what you want will come to you [in its own time]. You just have to let go! 17 is still so young... don't trouble yourself worrying about relationships and guys. You've got the rest of your life to do that! LOL.


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## StereoXGirl (Dec 22, 2006)

The girls here are giving great advice.  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> I didn't date at all until I was 23, so I've definitely felt some of what you're feeling.

I would say definitely do not settle and try to focus on growing into the person that you desire to be during this time of singleness.  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## dlwt2003 (Dec 22, 2006)

Hey I didnt marry till I was 43, so there is hope for us all. Enjoy your life, your friends, your family. You are only young once, so enjoy it and dont sweat the small stuff. Have confidence in yourself and the rest will come. Besides all the boyfriends I had when I was your age I WOULDNT BE CAUGHT DEAD WITH TODAY CAN WE SAY LOSERS lol.

Take care sweetie~~


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## sheil2009 (Dec 28, 2006)

me too (im 16 actually)! I feel so stupid sometimes, spec because i have been asked out buy a few great guys but i couldn't see past the picture. Just remember, you aren't getting married anytime soon, finding the perfect guy takes a while but there isn't a hurry! And it will just feel worse if you randomly hookup; you'll gain a bad reputation and it has no emotional benefit, just negatives.

Just for kicks: the parents say i can't date till i'm married. Such a good idea, no?


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## SwtValina (Dec 28, 2006)

My first boyfriend- at age 20


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## tadzio79 (Dec 28, 2006)

awww hon, don't worry!

I didn't start dating until I was 17.5 yrs old, my 1st and only boyfriend ended up marrying me after dating for 5 years, lol!


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## empericalbeauty (Dec 28, 2006)

My first uber serious relationship- Age 18..still together now!


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## ~*STArPRINCEZZ* (Dec 28, 2006)

I'm 17 and never had a a boyfriend either so don't feel bad  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## Tesia (Dec 28, 2006)

I am 18 and a freshman in college. I never had a boyfriend and I never even kissed a guy.


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## FeverDream (Dec 28, 2006)

I'm 20 and I've never been on a date, but I like it that way. My first kiss was at age 18, which I try not to think about. I wish I had waited until I was in a loving, committed relationship. Everything will come in its own time, just don't sacrifice your standards or your morals for the sake of expediency. The right guy will come along!


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## makeupwhore54 (Dec 29, 2006)

_I feel the same way. It is very upsetting._

:sleepyhead:


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## han (Dec 29, 2006)

count your blessings.. guys are doGGs.. nah not all of them, dont worry, you will in due time, i think the others gave you good advice..


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## ~*LiL_MiSs_NeY* (Dec 30, 2006)

dont worry- i know that is easier said then done but good things take time and usually happen when you least expect it


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## Harlot (Dec 30, 2006)

Wow, great advice ladies! But I never suspected that many girls had their first boyfriends or kiss at that age. My first passionate kiss was at 13 and real boyfriend at 14 (he was a senior) so I guess it was pretty young lol. Im 16 and Im kind of at that point and I feel like Ill never find somebody (Silly I know) So I think me being in love with my best friend is an act of desperation. Now come to think of it Im kind of doubting myself whether to tell him or not now. Maybe what I feel isnt real. Thanks you guys!!! You kind of saved me a bit from making an ass of myself  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> I should wait longer too.


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## jessimau (Dec 30, 2006)

Harlot, definitely be careful before making those kinds of declarations! You can't go back once you've done that with a friend and feelings can change so much when you're 16.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who kissed before having a boyfriend and had a boyfriend young. I mean, I know around here it wasn't weird but all you ladies are saying you didn't date until much later than I started. My first kiss was when I was 13 and it was actually a good experience (he knew what he was doing, I think). My first boyfriend was when we were both 14...we didn't go to the same school so we never saw each other, but we talked on the phone every other day. It wasn't much of a relationship, really.

I say don't worry about how old you are when you start dating or find a boyfriend. My best friend dated a good amount (once she was in college) but only after she'd been out of college for a couple years did she date a man willing to call her his girlfriend (she must've been 22 or 23 when they met). Now she's with only her second boyfriend and they're talking about marriage (they're both 26, as am I); they'll have been together 2 years on New Years Eve. So it happens, and really I think in the end everything works out the way it's supposed to. Sometimes we just have to trust that we can't know everything, we just know that things will work out.


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