# awful weekend



## sarah_j1985 (Oct 9, 2005)

I just wanted a place to vent out all my anger and frustration bout this weekend, i know my problems are so silly compared to other ladies REAL problems but im jus gonna go for it. I have been seeing my boyfriend for approx 3months but we'v known eachother&amp;b een kinda together for a yr and a half. He had a boys-only holiday over the summer right before we got together, and i last nite i found out by accident that he slept with some random girl while on holiday.




his defense is that we werent "officially" together but since the holidays he's been lying about what he did. he told me nothing happened and refused to go into any more details. i thought fair enough &amp;forgot about it.

Now i just feel very betrayed, i know he didnt exactly cheat on me but it still hurts alot. When he was away he was texting me all the time telling me how he was always thinkin bout me &amp;missing me!!? wonder if that was still true while he was gettin it on with some skanky girl. Feel so hurt &amp;cant stop picturing him &amp;her together. I really jus want someone else's perspective because all my friends are his &amp;vice-versa. Really appreciate any opinons. thanks xxx


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## Geek (Oct 9, 2005)

OMG DUMP HIM ALERT. If he loved you, he would not sleep with anyone else.

DUMP ALERT!!


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## sarah_j1985 (Oct 9, 2005)

lol i said that to him &amp;he said we werent in love at that point. awk i dunno, its all v confusing, maybe a break would be a good idea


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## jennycateyez (Oct 9, 2005)

Tony Is Right, You Need To Leave Him, Why Would You Wanna Be With Somebody When You Keep Thinking About Him Hooking Up With Another Girl? He's No Good, Even If You Guys Werent In Love He Sould Of Been Straight Up About It


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## bluebird26 (Oct 9, 2005)

You don't deserve that kind of guy. If he did it once, he will do it again. Forgiving him is up to u and him. If I were you, I would dump him in a hearbeat.


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## tracybryant (Oct 9, 2005)

He has been telling you nothing happend up until now? Thats lying right there. I would def go for a break, and see if it turns into a break up. Lying or cheating are two things that are definite grounds for a breakup. Im so sorry this has happend to you



In the end though, do what YOU feel is right.


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## Pauline (Oct 10, 2005)

Hi there, I know you are very upset but did you say this was before you officially got together? I think you should forgive your bf, this was before you were a couple and if he hasn't done it since he;s been with you then i think he deserves a second chance.


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## iloveparis (Oct 10, 2005)

So sorry to hear that, Sarah



If it was me, I would probably dump him, not because of the sleeping part (coz he did it before u guys were serious) but because he LIED about it. Who knows what else he's been keeping from you?


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## phoenix461 (Oct 10, 2005)

Take a man's advice - from Tony - DUMP the guy!


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## greeneyedangel (Oct 10, 2005)

Originally Posted by *Pauline* Hi there, I know you are very upset but did you say this was before you officially got together? I think you should forgive your bf, this was before you were a couple and if he hasn't done it since he;s been with you then i think he deserves a second chance. I agree with this as well. If you weren't together, then he didn't feel the need/obigation to tell you. Why did you need/want to know anyway? As long as he's faithful to you now I'd say move on with it and be happy together



Goodluck!


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## lovesboxers (Oct 10, 2005)

I am sorry things turned out this way, but I have to agree with Tony.


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## Liz (Oct 10, 2005)

Originally Posted by *iloveparis* So sorry to hear that, Sarah



If it was me, I would probably dump him, not because of the sleeping part (coz he did it before u guys were serious) but because he LIED about it. Who knows what else he's been keeping from you? ditto. there's no reason to lie about it if it happened before you guys were together/serious.


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## MacForMe (Oct 10, 2005)

Awww, Sweety.. please read my posting here about learning to trust again. Its vaguely familiar to your problem. Once they lie, they will ALWAYS lie. Steve has been trying to get back into my life the last 2 weeks. Of course this is AFTER he found out about the new casual boyfriend/dating thing i have been doing. he's been whining to anyone and everyone how i am POWER DATING.. uh--yeah..

Anyway.. I found out too, that he did not tell me the ALL of the truth, just PARTS of the truth.. I told him, point blank, that if he did not think of me enough to tell me the truth and not do these things, that means, he doesn't think of me at all. 

Dump him Girl.. you'r better off..


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## Amethyst (Oct 11, 2005)

Dump him! You can do better.

He says you weren't "officially together" but yet he was text messaging you left and right? That's his excuse (not being "officially together") to justify what he did, however, text messaging you while on vacation (to keep you on the back burner, perhaps) This guy doesn't sound like he's playing with a full deck. I realize you're only together a short time but he should not have lied.

He's playing with your head. Get rid of him.


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## spice7 (Oct 11, 2005)

I would say give him a second chance, but I personally don't like the whole lying thing, if it weren't for that things might be more understandable....


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## devinjhans (Oct 11, 2005)

I think you should find someone else. You will never be able to get over him being with someone else even if you weren't officially together. You will always wonder if he will be with someone else or if he will lie to you again. That will always be the source of animosity.


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## xXxBeckyxXx (Oct 11, 2005)

i say dump him, i went thru a very similar thing. i no people are sayin well u wnt 2geva, but i wasnt with my bf at the time and it still hurts 2 no he did sumfin because of how close we were etc specially seein as he sed he loved me and wudnt let me b with any1 else (we were seein eachother for like a yr) we were bascially a couple it just wasnt official and didnt tell nobody 4 certain reasons. well its been like nearly 3yrs since and i stil think about it, cuz if he loved me then and did it and loves me now he cud still do it!... my bfs a rat he lies and lies until i found out the truth hes always been like it so i wud get out of it while u can cuz i very much doubt he wil change im stil hoping mine will.


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## petite syrah (Oct 16, 2005)

I szy listen to Tony. You can never trust someone who you know has lied to you. You deserve better than that, and if he thinks he can get away with that, he will play you like a fiddle. See what happens if you break up with him. If you decide to stay with him, please be very cautious...a liar can be very convincing. Take care of yourself and be grateful that you found out now what he is capable of. Follow your instinct.

Petite Syrah


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## sarah_j1985 (Oct 16, 2005)

just wanted to say thank you so much to everyone for replying to my post.I've told him i want a break from everything for a while. i miss him but its best off this way. Thanks again everyone, its funny how people who Iu don't properly know can really understand exactly how Im feeling. I really appreciate it all ur support and kind words. thank you so much xxx


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## babykisses (Oct 24, 2005)

Originally Posted by *Tony(admin)* OMG DUMP HIM ALERT. If he loved you, he would not sleep with anyone else. 
DUMP ALERT!!

I TOTALLY AGREE WITH TONY!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## FeistyFemme (Oct 24, 2005)

Originally Posted by *sarah_j1985* just wanted to say thank you so much to everyone for replying to my post.I've told him i want a break from everything for a while. i miss him but its best off this way. Thanks again everyone, its funny how people who Iu don't properly know can really understand exactly how Im feeling. I really appreciate it all ur support and kind words. thank you so much xxx You did the right thing - hang in there!


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## MARIAN (Oct 24, 2005)

get out now. it's only been 90 days and he has failed the good bf test

Originally Posted by *sarah_j1985* I just wanted a place to vent out all my anger and frustration bout this weekend, i know my problems are so silly compared to other ladies REAL problems but im jus gonna go for it. I have been seeing my boyfriend for approx 3months but we'v known eachother&amp;b een kinda together for a yr and a half. He had a boys-only holiday over the summer right before we got together, and i last nite i found out by accident that he slept with some random girl while on holiday.



his defense is that we werent "officially" together but since the holidays he's been lying about what he did. he told me nothing happened and refused to go into any more details. i thought fair enough &amp;forgot about it. Now i just feel very betrayed, i know he didnt exactly cheat on me but it still hurts alot. When he was away he was texting me all the time telling me how he was always thinkin bout me &amp;missing me!!? wonder if that was still true while he was gettin it on with some skanky girl. Feel so hurt &amp;cant stop picturing him &amp;her together. I really jus want someone else's perspective because all my friends are his &amp;vice-versa. Really appreciate any opinons. thanks xxx


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## XOffendr (Oct 27, 2005)

I don't think he was actually obligated to tell you that he slept with anyone at all. If you were simply friends at the time that it happened, experiencing nothing more than a mere crush, I think it was entirely his business. 'Taking a break' because you found out that he had sex with someone before you two even started dating just teaches him that he's going to be punished for his misdeeds in the past, and he won't want to tell you the truth, in the future.


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