# I Need To Vent About Work Please !



## Amethyst (Aug 18, 2005)

I work in a small office. I assist 4 people but thankfully not all at once. 2 of them are hardly ever here. There is this one lady here who is also an assistant who assists the CEO of the firm. Whenever she gets more work than she can handle, she starts to whine and complain and before you know it, the entire office knows that she's complaining about her work load. She ends up getting help with it and I'm the one the work gets pushed to. Now, don't get me wrong. I am a total team player and don't mind helping out when there is extra work. But I don't like to be taken advantage of. While she delegates or asks that this extra work be delegated to me and one other assistant, she's _on personal calls_ _the moment her boss is out of sight_.




Its like - I'm working to get *HER *work done plus mine - while *SHE'S *yakking on the phone or walking around the office complaining about it to everyone who will listen. If she used all that time productively instead of complaining about her workload, everything would get done. Its not my problem that she has problems with time management. If I know I have a heavy load, I don't spend my time on personal calls and such. This woman should know better - she's in her 50's! She's not straight out of college.

The thing is, she always gets help and gets away with this. She's the most senior administrative person here and she's chummy-chummy with the CEO's son who works here as well. This is a small family-owned business.

I'm only at this job two years and I'm already frustrated and want to leave. I hate it when people don't carry their own or take advantage and try to delegate all their work to others so they can kick back. My "main" boss ended up listening to her and giving me half the work that this lady can't do and gave the other half to another administrative person.

You don't expect behavior like this from someone who is supposed to be a seasoned professional.

I've been trying to work slower intentionally to make them worried, or wake up or something because they all know that I work fast and efficiently so that's probably another reason why I get all the extra work. I don't get extra $$$ for it either so forget about even asking for more.

I just don't want to be taken advantage of anymore and I know if I address this issue with her directly, there will be a big "to-do" about it because she is a MAJOR (and I mean *MAJOR*) drama queen. Whenever she doesn't get her way, she threatens to quit and her boss doesn't want to lose her so she ends up getting her way.


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## MacForMe (Aug 18, 2005)

awwww-- HUGS!

I know how that is. There really ISN"T anything you can do EXCEPT.. when HER work gets PUSHED on you, POLITELY NOW.. say that you would LOVE to help her out, however, you need to get your OWN work done, and if there is any time left you will lend a hand.. This way, you look (and probably ARE) responsible for your own stuff, and not for nothing, but won't YOU get into trouble if your own work isnt completed???

So, thats what i would do, say, "Wow, Mary, i can see you are really overwhelmed right now, but I am too, (then tell her a list of stuff you have to do) I would LOVE to help you, but I dont want to get in trouble if my workload suffers, but if i have time later, i can help, ok?"

If that doesn't work.. then, its time to blow the whistle on her... tell your boss that you LOVE your job and thik the team atmosphere is great, but while he's not looking she's goofin and you end up pickin up the slack.. and be ready to PROVE it.


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## Amethyst (Aug 18, 2005)

Thanks for the advice. I'm so ripping mad right now.

The thing is, the people at my job, I've discovered, are a bunch of wishy-washy sissies. They HATE confrontation. And while my boss (who is one of the senior partners in the firm) complained right back *TO* her, she still ended up helping her out. My boss came to me and twists it around and says, "I don't know how I got roped into this but....here I need you to work on this."

I then said to my boss, "well, what about all my other work". Do you know what she tells me? "Well, _we all_ have to juggle, so just alternate between you work and this other work." _(She refused to say who it was for, although I knew)._

These people will talk about you in whispers with their doors right open, and you can hear everything. I feel like getting up and shutting the door and saying, if you're going to talk / gossip, etc. at least shut your door.

I seem to be the only person here who can juggle / multi-task, etc., and this other witch sits on her lazy butt while she delegates all her work out !!

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





on top of all that, one of my boss's has a family member with cancer so I am trying to not go to her unless I have a major problem. I could ignore this, do the work and let it eat me up inside, while this witch gets away with pushing off her work to me OR I can raise a ruckus, just like SHE does. I'm trying to choose my battles carefully because I know if I open my mouth about this, I will be the "individual of the month" here at work that she'll be complaining about or tries to make trouble for.

I just don't know what the heck to do.


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## gamaki (Aug 18, 2005)

I was a receptionist for five years at the same place up until last January so I know the exact type of bullshit you are talking about. I agree that you should slow down your own workload and tell her straight out that you have your own work to do. She's taking advantage and knows she can get away with it. I hate when people are like that.

Call her on it. I would. At least she knows you're on to her. The next time she's so "overloaded" with work, just say "well, maybe you should try to finish your work first before you talk on the phone, and then if you still can't seem to get it done, I'll gladly help you finish it." say in front of someone else so she gets exposed for being a slacker and so that she can't twist your words around. Also, say it in the nicest way possible so she can't accuse you of just being nasty.


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## Amethyst (Aug 18, 2005)

You got the picture right on target.

This lady will get on the phone and argue with her girlfriends and the entire office will hear her and not say a word!

The minute her boss is out of sight, she's on the phone talking personal crap or goes out shopping for an extended lunch hour. Then when her boss is around, all you hear her do is sigh and moan about how busy she is, how much work he gives her, how he can't wipe his butt without her and on and on and on.

Meanwhile - not to sound like I'm bragging - but I've worked for a demanding CEO before...and I still got the work done all before 5 and by the deadline. You gotta pick the right time to slack and the time to get busy.

So right now, I'm the one slacking...cuz I'm so pissed !!


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## gamaki (Aug 18, 2005)

I just read your reply. I think you should definetly expose their immature ways. If they don't like confrontation, then they won't like being exposed for being slackers. You should do exactly as you said the next time you hear them gossiping. Go for it. At least you got the balls (well, not literally) to speak the truth to thier faces. What's the worst that could happen? You've proven you're capable with your duties so they can't attack you that way.


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## Amethyst (Aug 18, 2005)

They would be shocked if I did that &amp; I can see it coming to that.

I'm the one that minds my own business, does my work, sits on one side of the office and doesn't get involved in office b.s.

They probably think I'm too good-natured to speak up but I think the time has come. Well, if they don't like it, they can fire me, but they won't get someone who can work as fast as I can *AND* stay the hell off the phone.


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## gamaki (Aug 18, 2005)

Originally Posted by *Amethyst* They would be shocked if I did that &amp; I can see it coming to that.
I'm the one that minds my own business, does my work, sits on one side of the office and doesn't get involved in office b.s.

They probably think I'm too good-natured to speak up but I think the time has come. Well, if they don't like it, they can fire me, but they won't get someone who can work as fast as I can *AND* stay the hell off the phone.

That's right! Know your self-worth and make sure they know it too. Don't be affraid to stick up for yourself, even if it means losing a job, I HATE people being taken advantage of. That shit just gets me fired up. Although,I think it's possible to stick up for yourself and not get fired.


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## Amethyst (Aug 18, 2005)

I guess its all how I word it and best if I wait until I calm down a bit. My *main* boss is gone until Tuesday, but I might send her an e-mail tomorrow to her home (good to keep these things documented) on the other hand, I think if I explain my frustrations in person, that might be better...





I don't know, which way rather, what do you think ?


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## gamaki (Aug 18, 2005)

I think it's best if done face to face. I could be wrong though so ask a few other people to see what they think.


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## QurlySq (Aug 18, 2005)

wow, you two are much better than i because if this was a constant thing at my job, i would have been searching the classifieds by now... well, actually, i do have a similar situation but it's not with any co-workers (because i work in a two person department) but that's another, longer , story....

but... i truly doubt that the co-worker is going to turn over a new leaf whether she's confronted or not, whether there's witnesses or not... she sounds like someone who's made an art of "getting over"... this might be one of those situations where you either suck it up, or move on... as sucky as that may be...


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## Amethyst (Aug 18, 2005)

I tend to agree with you about face-to-face too.





Thanks so much for the advice...we'll see what happens with this. But its definitely not over yet.


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## jessica9 (Aug 18, 2005)

i think if you present it to your boss in a very calm and reserved manner, expressing how much you enjoy working there, that may be a start. unfortunately, it seems like he likes this woman for one reason or another quite a bit if she can threaten to quit and he begs her to stay. she is definately taking advantage of you, and i would also go as far as saying that your boss is as well. he understands it is not part of your job description to pick up this lady's work while not being compensated. if you are quiet, non-confrontational, keep to yourself, and are an efficient worker, it is all the easier to do because they think you will put up with it. i know; i am the same way and it has happened to me more than once. i was a in class tutor and teacher's assistant for a college professor who tried to have me do all her personal busywork (secretarial work) that was not in my job description at all. i went to my superior and described the situation, and because my other superior was chummy with the professor, i went through a lot of unncessary grief and received quite a verbal whipping from the professor. but i did the right thing. i really enjoyed my job and leaving was not something i was willing to do because one woman was taking advantage of me.

however, my mother is in a situation similar to yours. her boss just quit and they decided not to hire another for the position and to divide the work between her and one other person. not to mention that they fired someone else the year before and did not replace him, and she had to take on his work all by herself. it is ridiculous, so she is looking for another job. in her case, bringing the issue up is not worth it, and finding another job is the best option.

so, you could start looking for another job, since you did mention it is a small family run business and sometimes relations are different in such a setting. but you know better than anyone what you should do if you reflect upon it some. you have to do something though, because these sort of things happen in every workplace once in a while, and you deserve to stick up for yourself in a calm and non-confrontational manner and be comfortable in your job. good luck to you and tell us how things go!

jessica


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## NYAngel98 (Aug 18, 2005)

Maybe you should bring up to your boss that you think that maybe things would go smoother in "the office" (instead of just pinpointing one person) if EVERYONE would keep personal phone calls on an EMERGENCY only basis. Maybe see if they can send out a company memo.... so she'll get the memo, think they're onto her... and maybe cut her crap. If this doesn't work, I'd just keep her shit piled on your desk until 5 min. before closing time... then calmly walk to her desk, plop it all down and say "Sorry, I didn't have a chance to get to this" with a satisfying smirk


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## jessica9 (Aug 18, 2005)

janelle

i think that is a great idea! yes! much better than mine! i would follow janelle's advice!

jessica


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## NYAngel98 (Aug 19, 2005)

Originally Posted by *jessica9* janelle
i think that is a great idea! yes! much better than mine! i would follow janelle's advice!

jessica

Can you tell I've been in that situation before?? Is it that obvious?? lol


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## Sofia (Aug 20, 2005)

I was in the same exact situation a few years ago. I was working at this major financial company and the other analyst would do nothing but complain about her workload so of course they shifted some of it to me. I was fuming, because she was the type to also be on the phone all day and then go out for long lunches, yet have problems finishing up her work, go figure.



The laps around the floor weren't helping her work get done either.

I had been there almost a year, so I figured I'll take it the first couple of times, but then it became an everyday thing. I was not having it. The first thing I did was put a note on her desk saying "I'm watching you", lol, of course I didn't sign my name to it and she got back on track, but then it all started up again by the following week. After that I went to my Director and said that I don't mind doing the extra work, but when others slack off and then I have to pay for it, it's unfair. His reply shocked the hell outta me. He said well then I hope you don't mind the increase in pay and any extra paid overtime you'll be getting since we're downsizing, starting with your neighbor.

I guess they were really watching her.





My suggestion to you is, definitely slow down your production, but not to the point where it looks like you can't handle your work, only to the point where extra work can't be handed down to you. And definitely speak up. It will start eating you up inside and then you'll resent going to work each day and that doesn't make for a healthy anything.


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## petite syrah (Oct 16, 2005)

Originally Posted by *Amethyst* You got the picture right on target.
This lady will get on the phone and argue with her girlfriends and the entire office will hear her and not say a word!

The minute her boss is out of sight, she's on the phone talking personal crap or goes out shopping for an extended lunch hour. Then when her boss is around, all you hear her do is sigh and moan about how busy she is, how much work he gives her, how he can't wipe his butt without her and on and on and on.

Meanwhile - not to sound like I'm bragging - but I've worked for a demanding CEO before...and I still got the work done all before 5 and by the deadline. You gotta pick the right time to slack and the time to get busy.

So right now, I'm the one slacking...cuz I'm so pissed !!

Start keeping a record of her goofing off. In other words, when she is on the phone, pay attention and write down the time she got on and got off. Keep a record of how often she complains and how often her work is delagated because of it. Be specific in your record keeping and don't tell anyone in the office you are doing this...AND I MEAN NO ONE. Hide your notes or take them home with you. After you capture specific times and dates of her screwing around, then consider discussing the situation with other workers and if they agree,go all together to the superiors and now bring your notes. The other thing you can do is wait til you get your next review and bring this up to your boss. The third thing you can do is schedule a meeting with your boss and ask for a raise. You will confidently tell him that you are an asset since you do your own work and her's as well. Bring your notes into the meeting to show how often you get stuck with her work and you have always come through. You can also suggest to her that since her workload seems to be so overwhelming, perhaps she should speak to her boss about hiring another staff member. Good luck

Petite Syrah


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## Amethyst (Oct 17, 2005)

Thanks for all your advice. As a matter of fact, I did keep track of all her calls.

But things have gone from bad to worse and to make a long story short, I'm looking for another job. This time, hopefully in a larger company that has a designated human resources/personnel department.

No more small "mom &amp; pop&amp; firms for me.

Until then, I'm really trying to cope.

thanks again.


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## petite syrah (Oct 17, 2005)

Originally Posted by *Amethyst* Thanks for all your advice. As a matter of fact, I did keep track of all her calls. 
But things have gone from bad to worse and to make a long story short, I'm looking for another job. This time, hopefully in a larger company that has a designated human resources/personnel department.

No more small "mom &amp; pop&amp; firms for me.

Until then, I'm really trying to cope.

thanks again.

I am sorry things are not working out. I do hope you find something that is more suitable and you will be happy. It is terrible to have to go to a job that you hate. It is unfortunite that people have to spoil things and I hope this woman gets hers one of these days. Don't be surprised if they catch on to her crap one day. In the meantime, you have to think of yourself and what will make you happy. May-be this is actually a blessing in disguise and you will land a terrific position with more money. Good luck. Let us know.Petite Syrah (Gail)


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## Amethyst (Oct 19, 2005)

Thank you!


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