# Friend Talking To Your Ex



## CellyCell (Apr 13, 2007)

You and your ex broke up.

Your friend sorta didn't know - and she starts talking to him AFTER you broke up.

And you asked her to stop - but she doesn't see a big deal out of it because all they're doing is "talking".

YET your ex is obviously somewhat into her.

Cast vote on what you would do.

And yes this is happening to me - and I'm pissed off at my "friend".

Any opinions or similar things happend to you?


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## YoursEvermore (Apr 13, 2007)

I haven't had this happen, personally, but I've seen it happen and ruin friendships of other people around me. I totally agree with you, though. I would be pissed. She should respect you and your friendship and NOT talk to him.


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## Jennifer (Apr 13, 2007)

hellllllllll no! i'd kick both their asses to the curb.

i've never had it happen, though, no.


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## AngelaGM (Apr 13, 2007)

I think you both feel that way because you both are young, as you mature it won't matter.


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## XkrissyX (Apr 13, 2007)

i will kick her ass ,mama!:nunu:


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## Karen_B (Apr 13, 2007)

It all depends - I don't have a problem with my friends talking to my exes, however I wouldn't like it if my friend started coming on to my ex just after we broke up.


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## Maysie (Apr 13, 2007)

yeah I don't think that's cool. It would be one thing if they were really good friends before you broke up...but otherwise its super disrespectful.


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## pinksugar (Apr 13, 2007)

I'm with Karen. I don't have a problem with it unless she's coming onto him, but if my friend asked me to stop talking to her ex, then I would, because how can you hurt her even more if she's just come out of a breakup? That shows a lack of respect for her feelings, unless she's KNOWN for being completely over the top, LOL


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## Saja (Apr 13, 2007)

It would depend on how long i had been with the guy first of all. It would also depend on why we broke up....and the who the friend was.


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## han (Apr 13, 2007)

it would depend if i still had feeling for my ex.. if not then i wouldnt care who talk to him, but out of respect for friends i wouldnt consider ever talking/dateing there ex somehow after my friends date/sleep with a guy i no longer look at the guy like that its a turn off


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## EyeCandyDiva (Apr 13, 2007)

I jut think it's a golden friendship rule for friends NOT to date ex's of friends, even if you no longer love or want the guy. There are too many other men out here for her to date someone I dated, especially if I was intimate with him. It just makes me wonder, did they have some kind of hidden feelings while we were dating.


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## pinksugar (Apr 13, 2007)

oooh... creepy 'I had feelings WHILE YOU WERE TOGETHER BUT COULDN'T TELL YOU' vibes are the worst!!! *shudder!* I'm with you EyeCandy! And it's true, there are too many guys out there to date someone i dated!


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## msctp (Apr 13, 2007)

I have to agree with EyeCandyDiva &amp; YoursEvermore. I feel it is a matter of respect and some lines you just don't cross...at all.


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## Princess6828 (Apr 13, 2007)

I put don't know because it would depend on how long it's been I feel. Like - I broke up with my ex four years ago, and quite frankly I wouldn't give a crap if one of my friends started talking to him. But if I broke up with Nick and like next week one of my friends started talking to him I'd be devastated.


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## han (Apr 13, 2007)

i agree^^ it would make me wonder what was "up" while i was dateing the ex and question the loyalty of my friend and if i could trust her and feel comfortable with her around my current so... i just think it could create problems now that i really think about it.


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## CellyCell (Apr 13, 2007)

Okay - it confirmed that I'm not crazy.

Haha. Even tho I'm trying to move on from my ex...

I feel like since he hurt me - he has no right speaking to my friends, you know? Especially since he also hurt my best friend also.

And this other "friend" doesn't seem to think nothing is wrong with speaking with my ex because (in her words) "I don't own him". It's not about control who he sees &amp; who he doesn't... because frankly, if it were some other chick - I wouldnt care. But no, he decides to get close to my friend...

Knowing me for almost 2 years and only knowing him for 2 weeks - makes me question why she would side with him. Even tho both say "nothing is going on"... if there wasn't, it'd be easy to stop talking to him. I don't think she doesnt stop because she likes him. I would never think to speak or talk to my friend's exs - and even if I did befriend them and my friend told me to stop talking to him/her... I would oblige, no questions asked.

I know I should move on and leave them at be - I just wanted to make sure I have a reason to be upset with her and it's a legit reason. I'm already not speaking to him (my ex) - I'm more hurt at her response to all of this.

I'm uneased by all this.

Thanks for answering!


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## Saje (Apr 13, 2007)

looks like your friend isnt really a friend afterall.

Sorry :


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## Kathy (Apr 13, 2007)

Ditto!!


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## Aprill (Apr 13, 2007)

It really depends on the individual situation. If the relationship is over, and you know that it is over, why be mad because he had moved on? First of all it is a boyfriend, not a husband. I could understand if two people were married and this happened, but some men are dogs, some females are promiscuous, and sometimes Shit happens.

I think stats say that for every man there are 10 women, which means that there is a man shortage, lol. j/k, not a good excuse for what she did but you girls are young. And remember, there is a reason that you two are not together, something had to be wrong with him, let her have the problem. If he was the perfect man u two would be together


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## Duchess Ravenwaves (Apr 13, 2007)

I don't blame you for being pissed at your friend, I think if you consider someone a friend that you would expect that person to be at your side, rather than becoming friends with your ex.


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## tinktink22 (Apr 13, 2007)

i talk to my friends ex. i even went to prom with him. but ive known him sine elementary and we were really close for 2 years by then. if it happened to me i wouldnt mind. i have no future with that person why hold someone else back from possibly having a future with him?!


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## Dragonfly (Apr 14, 2007)

I agree with Angela and April.

Why didn't you tell your friend the full story about you and him breaking up?

Then she would have known what was going on, and avoided him out of respect for you.

But I'm confused. Your friend is talking to him? What is wrong with two people talking?

If this was a serious, long term relationship - at least one year, then out of respect your friend should not date him. But if you only dated him a few months, then he is available to anyone IMO.


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## CellyCell (Apr 14, 2007)

Me and her never got the chance to talk about our break up...

...and really, we (ex &amp; I) were trying to work things out (friendship-wise) until she popped in unexpectantly and it all went downhill from there.

I'm more annoyed that she's taking sides with someone she knew for 2 weeks now than seeing it my way.

And the other day I tried telling her what had happen between me &amp; him and I felt like she didn't care - he was at one point using her to get me upset (he admitted at first). I told her and she said she didn't care if he was using her (she is tweaked the eff out).

I talked to a lot of people and came to same conclusion - friends dont do that to one another... *WHEN* that person is uncomfortable with a friend talking to an ex. Especially when its big time flirting.

It's childish, I know... but I, in a way, felt like protecting her from what he had said to me and my friends and had to let her know - he ain't one to really trust (WAS trying to build up trust again). She is so boy crazy... she doesnt even care.

And Tinktink, if SHE had known him before me - than that's fine... but she didn't. This is the 2nd time she has a 'something' with guys I used to talk too. Unnerving.

I just really needed confirmation that my feelings are okay to have. So thanks for the advices and comments...

And to vent really - it prolly sounds so dramatized to you guys. Haha.


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## Aprill (Apr 14, 2007)

now see, that's a different story, I might have hurt her physically, lol


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## breathless (Apr 15, 2007)

i wouldn't care. if them two seem to be a better match, go ahead! i'm done with the ex anywho. lol.


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## pinksugar (Apr 15, 2007)

lol I don't think she sounds like a very nice person, but she'll find out the hard way that people break up for a reason. Your cast off guys are cast off for a reason. What kind of person would even be INTERESTED after what you'd told her?

I dunno. She sounds weird. You're definately entitled to your feelings, and have every right to vent  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## girl_geek (Apr 15, 2007)

I don't know, depends on the situation ... like how long we've been broken up, whether I have any lingering feelings for him, how serious the relationship was, etc.

However, regardless of how you feel, it is rude that your friend continues to talk to him after you asked her to stop -- I think you are justified in being angry just because your friend is not being respectful!


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## CellyCell (Apr 15, 2007)

Been broken up officially for 2 weeks from now.

I never had time to like... get over him before she moved in.

Stupid girls, ugh.

Aye yi yi.

No more. Karma... I hope for karma!

Thanks girls!

I am feeling a lot better now.  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## pinkbundles (Apr 15, 2007)

I guess it depends on the nature of our breakup and how close I am to the friend. If the breakup was very painful for me and the friend is a very good friend of mine, she wouldn't talk to the scumbag! But if the breakup didn't mean anything, then I don't think I'd care.


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## Lila (May 1, 2007)

If it's an ex from my past a long time ago &amp; the friend is just like a friend not a best/close friend, I probably wouldn't care. But if it's a recent ex I probably would.


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## adrianavanessa (Sep 14, 2007)

Then that's not a "friend". B/C you need him out of your life and she is still talking to him..ugh... I know how that feels.


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