# He's a party animal!



## Tears_Of_Blood (Aug 18, 2006)

My boyfriend of 5 months, goes to parties. and he is a big drinker, sometimes i get worried. i trust him and all, dont get me wrong, but like hes drunk im just afraid he wouldnt knwo what hes doing. But he has gone to multiple parties before and gotten wasted but hes never done anything yet. And i know him though, like hes honestly a good boy, and he has a reallllly guilty concious. i still get worried, am i paranoid? or overrreacting? do i really trust him ?


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## Annia (Aug 18, 2006)

Personally, I don't think I'd trust some one who drinks like that. Stuff just starts going down hill from there.

Drinking way too much causes problems whether it be violence, alcohol poisoning, drinking and driving (not that I am accusing him of doing that your post did not indicate any of that), bad decisions.. etc.

Sounds like he needs to slow down or find his limit.


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## Saja (Aug 18, 2006)

Hes way to young to be drinking....thats all I can say


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## VenusGoddess (Aug 18, 2006)

If he's your age and he's already got an out-of-control drinking habit...I would tell you to run far, far away from him. He's in the early stages of alcoholism already. While you may "love" him...know that being with an alcoholic is pure hell. Love yourself more and live your life and be happy...there is no reason that you should be dealing with this so young in life.

Let go...move on...let him be.


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## bluebird26 (Aug 18, 2006)

I'd say get away from him while you can. The more time you have a relationship with him, the more difficult it will be to get away when everything gets worse.


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## shockn (Aug 18, 2006)

Cheaters are the scum of the earth. Drunken cheaters are the scum of the universe. lol Drunken cheating doesnt "just happen" just happens to make a nice excuse.

Otherwise to go on what the other girls said anyone drinking at that age period is wrong. Infact it's just kind of sad. Im sure you can do much better.


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## pinkbundles (Aug 18, 2006)

i would personally be worried b/c why does it seem like he always gets drunk? it may be something he need to check on before it gets out of hand.


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## mabelwan (Aug 18, 2006)

You are not overreacting, tears_of_blood. I'd be worried too if my bf is a alcoholic. IMHO, you have to let him know your feeling and how you are so worrying about him. If he really loves you, he'll be able to get rid of this bad habit. Hopefully things get resolved soon. **HUGS**


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## Aquilah (Aug 18, 2006)

I agree w/ Angela about your boyfriend seeming to be in the beginning stages of alcoholism. You're not overreacting, but you're also WAY to young to be dealing with boyfriends who have problems such as this. I recommend letting him go and moving on. I grew up with an alcoholic mother, and that's the last thing I wish on anyone to have to deal with! Besides, what's to say he won't become abusive or violent at some point while drinking? It's just not worth it to me to spend your time worrying about whether or not your boyfriend is getting drunk left and right, especially if he's the same age as you are! Sweetie, I truly think it's just time to cut your losses with this guy and move on. "Love" can only take us so far before it's not enough on its own!


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## mossaenda (Aug 18, 2006)

Sit him down and tell him in a calm but firm voice that the drinking has got to stop NOW. If he doesn't change his behavior then he is intent on ruining his life. Don't let him ruin yours!!


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## ivette (Aug 18, 2006)

your definetly not overreacting. i can understand your concern.


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## CuTeLiCiOuS (Aug 19, 2006)

You should sit down with him and talk it out. Tell him how you feel and think. You are in a relationship. And it is okay you have a concern it does not make you paranoid or overrreacting.


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## girl_geek (Aug 19, 2006)

I agree with all the other posters...


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## Annia (Aug 19, 2006)

I forgot to mention, if he keeps doing this you should leave him. There is no way you should sacrifice, your time/love/security what ever it may be, for this guy!


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## LVA (Aug 19, 2006)

sounds like he's drinking more than spending time w/u .. but that's just my opinion


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## Tears_Of_Blood (Aug 19, 2006)

thanks everyone. well, uhhh yesturday i didnt want to spend my whole night worrying about him and stuff, so i drank with a couple of friends. i got wasted. it was bad. i busted my lip because my face banged the floor =| like, i didntforget about him thuogh, i kept calling and calling, but like itrust him and all. and hes very responsible though, like he knows when to stop, hes never thrown up or anything .


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## KimC2005 (Aug 20, 2006)

I'm not trying to be mean or anything, but it doesn't sound like you guys have a very healthy relationship... I would really ask yourself if this is the kind of person you want to be with..


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## lovelyarsenic (Aug 20, 2006)

I agree with what has been said so far. IMHO (from what I have seen up close and personal) a lot of people can get stuck in the habit of drinking because it is a good way for them to escape the realities of life - I think it'd be a good idea to sit down with your boyfriend and approach him calmly about the situation before making any quick decisions. If he is unwilling to change his ways (or even unwilling to discuss it in the first place) then I do believe it should be a clear choice to move on to someone who will treat you and himself better. I wish you the best of luck with everything - keep us posted.


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## Aquilah (Aug 20, 2006)

Originally Posted by *Tears_Of_Blood* thanks everyone. well, uhhh yesturday i didnt want to spend my whole night worrying about him and stuff, so i drank with a couple of friends. i got wasted. it was bad. i busted my lip because my face banged the floor =| like, i didntforget about him thuogh, i kept calling and calling, but like itrust him and all. and hes very responsible though, like he knows when to stop, hes never thrown up or anything . Forgive me for this, but you mean to tell me at 14 y.o. you went out and got wasted yourself last night?! I'm sorry honey, but it sounds like you're on a slight path for destruction. Between this guy you're dating and your behaviors in "trying" to not think about him, you're headed down the wrong path. Honestly, I believe you were worrying about him and your way of coping with it was to get drunk yourself. Doesn't add up, and doesn't make sense. Two wrongs definitely don't make a right, and that's exactly what you're doing. I'm sorry to sound harsh or cold, but I've been down that road and it's not pretty. I was headed towards alcoholism myself, and I nipped it in the bud before it could start. Seems to me like you're in a totally unhealthy relationship and you need out! You're way too young to be worrying about your boyfriend drinking, which is a BIG indicator he's not a good person to be with. You're also sitting here drinking yourself as a way of not dealing with an issue at hand (or so it seems to me), and that's not cool either. You're young with *LOTS* of life ahead of you, and you're technically beginning to "waste" it away over some guy who isn't worth much from MHO. I'm very sorry to sound mean, but this just doesn't seem very kosher to me. You need to get out of the relationship and focus on other things a typical 14 year old should be focused on. Worry about yourself, your future, your goals in life... Not some tool who prefers to drink over spend time with you! All just IMHO though! To quote something from your own profile:
Originally Posted by *Tears_Of_Blood* *I hate stupid boys who play with your heart, most of all, **I hate to be heartbroken.*

*Im immature.*

*People see straight through me.*

Your boyfriend, IMHO, is stupid and likes to play with your heart (given your other post about him breaking up w/ you and wanting you back like a day before your 5 mth. anniversay)... You're going to end up heartbroken the longer you stay with this guy... You're coming across as very immature given your actions of worrying about someone who is getting *TOO* wrapped up in alcohol *OVER* you, and you're doing the same it seems... And yes, this all does seem very apparent for us to see though...Sorry again if I sounded totally harsh, cruel or cold. Consider this a form of tough love... I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, but I think you need tough love over this situation, and it doesn't seem as though who are closest to you are giving it to you... It's not my place 100% either, but you did ask for advice...


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## VenusGoddess (Aug 20, 2006)

So, you think he's responsible because he's never thrown up while drinking? Responsible would be NOT drinking underage.

Makes me wonder...what do your and his parents think about you all drinking?


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## girl_geek (Aug 20, 2006)

I agree with Aquilah. I was also worried when you said that you reacted by getting drunk yourself, that really worried me... you are worried about your bf drinking and yet you go out and do the same? How does it make it ok for you to drink but not him? I'm also not trying to be mean, but I just think you two need to sit down and really think about where you're heading, because so far nothing about this relationship sounds healthy to me


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## CuTeLiCiOuS (Aug 20, 2006)

I have to defenitely agree ^with Aquilah. I did not know you were 14. You should distance yourself or deattach youself from him in that way. You are a kid, a child. Your bodies and braines cannot take ahchol. At this ago NO, you are stopping the development of neurons in your brain. Be a good freind. Be there for him when he needs you. You are young, get him some perfessional help. May it be a conseoulr, pshycolgoist, or a teacher. He is not bad or an evil person, he has a problem. You drinking and dealing with your isssues like that is going, not probably But will effect you. &lt; In here you have no option or choice. But you do have the choice to stop it and prevent it from occuring. Not only are you hurting yourself, but your brain. Be strong and get help. Its nothing wrong to ask for help. You may not realize this, and i don't blame because you are a child you are a baby but this is not love. STay in there = )


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## Annia (Aug 21, 2006)

Wow, that's new info. Yeah I am going to have to agree with the following posts.. Aquilah, Venusgoddess, and Girl_geek.

I think you need intervention.. get help, like now? 14 is too young and you're not starting out in a healthy way. Drinking at your age closes a lot of opportunities for the future. You could be so much more right now.


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## Shelley (Aug 21, 2006)

It sounds like your bf has the beginnings of a drinking problem and you need to sit down and talk to him or leave. I agree with the others. Fourteen is too young to be drinking. Dealing with this by drinking yourself is not good. I would speak to someone, like an adult, parent, older sibling, someone you trust.


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## Heather12801 (Aug 21, 2006)

I just thought I would throw this in....just b/c he's not throwing up does NOT mean he's not taking his drinking way too far. I have taken shot after shot of vodka, and drank the entire bottle myself and didn't throw up. I have NO idea how, b/c you would think I would be close to alcohol poisoning, but I still didn't get sick. (Stupid, stupid younger days) I just don't want you to think that just b/c he's not getting sick means that it's not out of hand.

And as far as you worrying about him cheating. I can tell you from experience that alcohol and relationships can be a tricky situation. Someone that I loved VERY much cheated on me with some random girl when he was drinking. He is NOT that type of guy, never was and still isn't now, but drinking was I think an excuse for him to screw up. So, you're not being paranoid for worrying about stuff like that. I agree with the other girls in that you're too young to be carrying the weight of these problems. You would be much better off with someone who likes being with you and hanging out with you, instead of getting trashed at parties and hanging out with friends. I hope this doesn't sound mean, but you have no idea how much experience and pain this advice comes from. Trust me, it's MUCH better to end things now than regret it later. You can PM me if you ever need to talk. I will always be here to listen. I really hope things work out for you!!


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## Tears_Of_Blood (Aug 21, 2006)

yahh, i totally regret what i've done, and i learned my lesson . But there is no way he'll stop drinking, no way. Because honeslty, around my neighbourhood and stuff. EVERYBODY drinks.He wont stop, i know he wont. he doesnt do it often, only when he goes to parties. But he honestly, really knows hwo to push my buttons, like has your boyfriend ever joked around about getting other girls and stuff? like he does it so often, that its annoying, and it bothers me.


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## marshall1704 (Aug 21, 2006)

Honey, you guys are way too young to be drinking. My best friend is involved with a guy that constantly drinks and beats her up. She won't leave him like I have asked her too. You need to get away and fast. It will only get worse and cause more problems.


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## girl_geek (Aug 22, 2006)

Originally Posted by *Tears_Of_Blood* yahh, i totally regret what i've done, and i learned my lesson . But there is no way he'll stop drinking, no way. Because honeslty, around my neighbourhood and stuff. EVERYBODY drinks.He wont stop, i know he wont. he doesnt do it often, only when he goes to parties. But he honestly, really knows hwo to push my buttons, like has your boyfriend ever joked around about getting other girls and stuff? like he does it so often, that its annoying, and it bothers me. That is just another sign that he's not right for you, I don't think a boyfriend should ever joke about being with other girls.... I sure would be thinking twice about my boyfriend if he started joking like that!! I'm not trying to be mean, but why are you still dating a guy that drinks all the time, parties with his friends instead of spending time with you, and jokes about hooking up with other girls? You definitely deserve a guy that's better than that!
And just because everyone in your town drinks doesn't mean that you have to.... I grew up in a small town where almost everyone drank, too, yet I never drank, and I still had some friends in high school, and even more friends in college, and now I'm happily married! So I turned out fine without drinking, I was still able to find friends and boyfriends


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## KimC2005 (Aug 22, 2006)

I just am not really sure what you see in this guy to continue to be with him. I hope that you will see that you are worth much more than that and deserve to be treated so much better. It's not good for him to be joking around about getting with other girls. I think that you are too young to be worrying about all these relationship problems. Have fun and don't get into all this drama! I would be savoring these teenage years, because once you become an adult and are out on your own everything will change!!


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## Tears_Of_Blood (Sep 4, 2006)

i thought since school is starting tommorow no one would really have parties, but he's going to a party on friday. my boyfriend is literally friends with EVERYONE. but im sure im gtting worried over nothing. usually what happens. and he doesnt invite me to them before, i think itsz because the first couple he did invite me, but i always said no because i didnt want to embarass myself, and i was too shy to meet all his friends..so he just gavee up. and theres no way im going to invite myself, i probably wouldnt be allowed to go anyways. sometimes i wish he had no friends .. honestlyy



. but i cant imagine him doing anything, hes a very good boy likee he wont even skip a day of school. ever. his average is somewhere in the 90's. he has a guilty concious. but i know he falls all over the place when hes drunk, and i also know he gets really horny.


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## BrazenBrunhilda (Sep 4, 2006)

Cut this tiger loose, sister. He is a time bomb ready to explode...and you don't want to be anywhere near him when he does. Find another cutie and drop him like a dirty sock.


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