# Long hair haters



## cinnamingirl (Jul 3, 2006)

Some one posted this on the longhaircareforum and i thought this was so true so i decided to post it here because i believe it is a serious issue. Especially for african american women.

I just don't understand the nerve of some people! Is hair really all that serious to wish bad things upon people??

Why is there so much hair hate in the salon? When a woman with long hair walks in, why do some folks gotta hate? Stylists included!! Everyone is all in their hair trying to look for tracks. Some stylists will out anyone who is wearing a weave. If a woman with a weave is going to a salon to have her hair styled, what's wrong with asking her quietly if she has added hair before you start styling? Why yell all across the room "is that all yo hair?"

If you have long hair be careful of what stylist you use if you want a trim. Some of these undercover haters will chop the mess out of your hair, and some other clients will secretly be loving it! I've seen it with my own eyes!!! I've seen stylists purposely become rough with a woman's hair if it's long. Sometimes they'll make rude comments about how "nappy" it is.

I've heard other clients stare a woman with long hair down. When they see that it's all hers they make some rude comments. "she think she all that" what's even worse is overhearing someone make a malicious comment such as "i hope all that s*** falls out" Are these people for real???

My cousin wears weaves and looks gorgeous with them. She has them put in at a mostly white salon but has her hair styled at black salons. Whenever she goes to have her hair styled the stylist has to find a way to let everyone know it's not all hers. So one second everyone is staring and green with envy, the next second they are relieved to know that "that a'int all hers." If I was wearing a weave and the stylist felt the need to let everyone know this, I would get out of the chair and walk straight out. It's not like she is trying to deceive anyone, but it that everyone's business? I think it's proper protocol to ask privately if the client has added hair and then take the proper precautions when styling it. If others find out it is a weave, so what, but don't make stupid, loud comments like "Girl you got tracks all up and through yo head!" or even worse "Oh girl I was getting excited cause I thought that was all yo' hair, you betta quit!!"

Oh and naturals with some serious shrinkage going into a salon to get a press, beware. Some folks get jealous when they see your neck length hair go all down your back in a matter of minutes. Then when you leave they start whispering "Girl that 'nappy' s*** won't be all that long when the rain hit it"

Funny how all the haters are in the salon. It just isn't right.


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## _Dreamer_ (Jul 3, 2006)

wow i didnt even know about that, maybe that's why my hair stylist cut it so badly -.-''' but then again no one yelled at me =o and i'm not african american  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />

so interesting....so odd..IMO


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## Jennifer (Jul 3, 2006)

interesting...


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## cinnamingirl (Jul 3, 2006)

sad but true its happend to me. my hair was bra strap length and the hairstylist said i needed a "trim". she cut off 7 inches.....


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## CuTeLiCiOuS (Jul 3, 2006)

Yeah when I go to the salon my hairstylist always tells me to cut my hair off. She did it 4 years ago. I had long healthy hair because i didn't blowdry alot or use a flat iron, no split ends, no dry hair. it was healthy but she cut it all off more than 12 inches. I just wanted layers and 4 inches off. I think if you like having long hair than its okay, but thats not defenition of beauty.


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## Lil_Claude (Jul 3, 2006)

I always found everything you said to be true. I couldn't finish telling you how many times I went for a "TRIM" only to have my long hair ruined!!! after that I only got a don't worry it's a different style but you'll get used to it. arrgh!! that's why now I keep my trimmings to a minimum and only with this one girl i found who does what I say. Thank god I found her.


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## Gwendela (Jul 3, 2006)

I definitely believe this. My friend traveled to a bigger city to have his hair braided and he was amazed at the way they talked about the clients.


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## mintesa (Jul 3, 2006)

i ones was with a woman in the bus (with her husband). her hair looked like a mess. like when you take long hair and just try to make it into a mess by rubbing the hairs together, and then you end up with a ball that cant be combed.

So this woman has all her hair up in little hairballs, you can see that she had long hair. and that she cut off some of the balls, or ribbed them off. i asked her, what happened? she said she was comming from the hospital. she had a minor operation. there was another woman with her in the room. this woman always looked envious at her long hair.

So the next time she wakes up, her hair was like that, and the woman already checked out. she thinks this woman did it to her. anyway, her husband tried to comb her hair, but it didnt work. so he cut some balls off, but since he is not a hairstylist they just let it go and went home with the bus.

i actually found this so creepy!!! like a horror story i was scared!!!!

and i dont understand why people have to be jelous. i love beautiful things, i appreciate pretty things. why be jelous!?


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## mylaiva (Jul 3, 2006)

So true, girl, so true...


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## Harlot (Jul 3, 2006)

That is pretty sad. I for one don't believe in jeolousy and think people go way out of proportion for minor vengeance. Its stupid and time consuming. Now that Im trying to grow my hair long again I wont take it for any "trims" any time soon. I always tell the stylist a certain length I want him to cut and he ends up chopping it off &gt;  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> the nerve!


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## leemisa (Jul 4, 2006)

I used to experience this too. The women stylists would talk about customers right in front of other clients. I go to a male stylist now, and he's also Christian, so if anyone is talking about anyone, I can't hear it over the gospel music.


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## shockn (Jul 4, 2006)

I must admit I thought this article was suppose to be sarcastic until I read the replies... But now Im just a tad dumbfounded... You should be able to tell if someone is cutting your hair in the wrong way or too much. And while I don't agree with workers badmouthing their customers, its just as much the customers stupidity for giving them business time after time.


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## makeupfreak72 (Jul 4, 2006)

thats pretty crazy i have heard you know mexican myths or urban legends if you will that if you have long hair and some one is jelous of it it will fall off, well my hair is down past my waist (see pic in my profile, you can see some) and it was super super thick, and its wavy and i used to get soooo many compliments on the street and then just this past year it has been falling like crazy and i swear its soo thin my rubberband just slides off!1


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## PerfectMistake (Jul 4, 2006)

Didn't know that happened - darn!

My hair used to be pretty long


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## makeupfreak72 (Jul 4, 2006)

Originally Posted by *PerfectMistake* Didn't know that happened - darn! 
My hair used to be pretty long





yeah, i can believe there are long hair haters!!!


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## blondie36 (Jul 4, 2006)

i had the same thing happen to me, i said i just want a trim and they cut off 4 to five inches, so now what i do is act like i dont know what an inch is , i say i just want my ends trimmed about an inch. and by the wayabout how much is a inch. so they show me with their fingers and i say oh , ok! that way theres NO MISUNDERSTANDING)and i never had that promblem again, it really works


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## jennycateyez (Jul 4, 2006)

i hate haters period lol but if u really hate a girl cause she has long hair then u got some problems


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## Angie2006 (Jul 4, 2006)

I HAD hair down to my ass. It's always been hard to find someone to trim it because they will ALWAYS cut of 4+ inches. I guess they figure you have plenty :-/ In Jan, I went for a trim...told her repeatedly..ONLY take the bare minimum! By the time I left, she had taken about 8 inches....and Im NOT kidding. So...I was looking for somewhere else to go, a friend told me about her place. I went there, told her to whole story and of course, she was "appalled" She did a nice job. Went back for a second trim...SAME DAMN THING, took about 3 inches! I am seriously sick to death of it! I don't know who these stylists think they are that it's THEIR decision how we should wear our hair. Are they so damned money hungry that they have to have everyone with short hair so they have to get trimmed every 2-3 weeks? I've only met 3 people who trimmed what was necessary....2 moved and one I have personal issues with.

Im currently where I have spent most of my life...seeking a new hairstylist. :-(


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## Saja (Jul 4, 2006)

I dont have long hair anymore, but when I did, I always watched closely and told them if they were cutting tooo much. Please tell me you girls walked out without paying when they butchered your hair...I would throw a shitstorm if someone did that to me.


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## xkatiex (Jul 4, 2006)

Everyone can have beautiful hair, they just need to care for it!. I can't wait till my hairs longer.

Its awful how people are jealous of other peoples long hair



x


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## Nox (Jul 4, 2006)

I have NEVER had a positive experience in a black salon. The stylists would poke fun at people with natural hair, if you've had your hair relaxed but you weren't "blessed with good hair anyway", etc. Every single time, my hair would get jacked up! I now go to *Dominican salons only*, and alot of the sisters out there have been following suit in droves. They may not always speak English, but they know a trim is a trim, not three inches, not six inches. They love to work with long hair, and they love to help you get long hair. And get this, they don't use any harsh chemicals! Hispanics have hair ranging of ALL types so if you walk in, they know how to work with it. They are VERY inexpensive. You could walk in with a bird's nest on your head and come out with glossy, conditioned, sleek hair swinging everywhere!! Sisters everywhere, find a local Dominican Salon and GO!

They have helped me to maintain my long (track-free) hair. I highly recommend it!!


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## jennycateyez (Jul 4, 2006)

Originally Posted by *NoxiousByProxy* I have NEVER had a positive experience in a black salon. The stylists would poke fun at people with natural hair, if you've had your hair relaxed but you weren't "blessed with good hair anyway", etc. Every single time, my hair would get jacked up! I now go to *Dominican salons only*, and alot of the sisters out there have been following suit in droves. They may not always speak English, but they know a trim is a trim, not three inches, not six inches. They love to work with long hair, and they love to help you get long hair. And get this, they don't use any harsh chemicals! Hispanics have hair ranging of ALL types so if you walk in, they know how to work with it. They are VERY inexpensive. You could walk in with a bird's nest on your head and come out with glossy, conditioned, sleek hair swinging everywhere!! Sisters everywhere, find a local Dominican Salon and GO!
They have helped me to maintain my long (track-free) hair. I highly recommend it!!

http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e1.../DCFN0015a.jpg

i agree! i used to go to a dominican salon and they do hair really well and can deal with any types of hair. not expensive neither.


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## mintesa (Jul 4, 2006)

when i had long hair to my ass, i always trimmed them myself. i was scared coz i always have had bad parlor days.


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## eightthirty (Jul 4, 2006)

Originally Posted by *jennycateyez* i hate haters period lol



Love it J!


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## Gwendela (Jul 4, 2006)

Noxious you've got some great looking hair girl!

I live in such a constipated area that we don't have any black or dominican salons. Heck our Wal-Mart just started carrying black hair care products this past year.


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## cinnamingirl (Jul 4, 2006)

Originally Posted by *NoxiousByProxy* I have NEVER had a positive experience in a black salon. The stylists would poke fun at people with natural hair, if you've had your hair relaxed but you weren't "blessed with good hair anyway", etc. Every single time, my hair would get jacked up! I now go to *Dominican salons only*, and alot of the sisters out there have been following suit in droves. They may not always speak English, but they know a trim is a trim, not three inches, not six inches. They love to work with long hair, and they love to help you get long hair. And get this, they don't use any harsh chemicals! Hispanics have hair ranging of ALL types so if you walk in, they know how to work with it. They are VERY inexpensive. You could walk in with a bird's nest on your head and come out with glossy, conditioned, sleek hair swinging everywhere!! Sisters everywhere, find a local Dominican Salon and GO!
They have helped me to maintain my long (track-free) hair. I highly recommend it!!

http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e1.../DCFN0015a.jpg


oh my gosh . i have really thick and curly hair and when my curls were longer the hairstylists would make fun of me _all _the time. they would tell me i need to get a relaxer and just make rude comments. one time they skipped me and didnt even do my hair. i started to cry. it was horrible. its ironic that u brought that up.


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## LipglossQueen (Jul 4, 2006)

This is interesting thread yet so true, the 'good' stylists are few and far between, I would love to visit a Dominican hair salon and get my hair done but here in London we mostly have a Columbian/Ecuadorian community instead of people from the DR.


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## NYAngel98 (Jul 5, 2006)

Originally Posted by *Angie* I HAD hair down to my ass. It's always been hard to find someone to trim it because they will ALWAYS cut of 4+ inches. I guess they figure you have plenty :-/ In Jan, I went for a trim...told her repeatedly..ONLY take the bare minimum! By the time I left, she had taken about 8 inches....and Im NOT kidding. So...I was looking for somewhere else to go, a friend told me about her place. I went there, told her to whole story and of course, she was "appalled" She did a nice job. Went back for a second trim...SAME DAMN THING, took about 3 inches! I am seriously sick to death of it! I don't know who these stylists think they are that it's THEIR decision how we should wear our hair. Are they so damned money hungry that they have to have everyone with short hair so they have to get trimmed every 2-3 weeks? I've only met 3 people who trimmed what was necessary....2 moved and one I have personal issues with.Im currently where I have spent most of my life...seeking a new hairstylist. :-(

oh wow... that's horrible!



I hate when some stylists give others a bad name because they don't LISTEN to clients. There were times when clients wanted something that really wouldn't work w/ their lifestyle or hair texture/length... but you can come up with some sort of solution. A longer layer here, a blunter edge there... But a TRIM!?!?



That's crazy... lol I hope you find someone out there that will help you...


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## monniej (Jul 5, 2006)

people think you're crazy when you say things like this, but they are very, very true! i haven't been to a salon in more than 2 years, and i never plan to go back. every time i do something bad happens and i know it ain't no accident! ladies be careful because the haters are everywhere!


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## saramy (Jul 5, 2006)

been there, done that myself. I used to get my hair done by a close friend until she said "Whose the stylist here? me or you?" thats all it took for me to go to someone else. I finally found someone who cuts just what I ask.


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## SerenityEludes (Jul 5, 2006)

ughhh! that happened to me last year! I went to get a trim and what started off as my hair almost bra strap ended up BARELY touching my shoulders. Because of .. "dead ends" and she was so called trying to "salvage what was left of my hair" BULL****!!!






Since then i am the ONLY one to touch my hair.To this day i get all teary eyed thinking about it. My hair has grown quite a bit since i've been taking care of it myself but it hasnt gone back to where it was before yet.



... I promised myself that if i cant make it grow then no one will. Im not going to pay someone to hate and purposely mess up my hair. Then again i should have listened to my mom... she said the worst thing you can do sometimes is have a female cuttin your hair. Find the nearest MALE stylest and let him do it. Their more trust worthy.

edit if you wanna see my hair now its in my profile... the picture cuts some of it out though.


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## charish (Jul 5, 2006)

wow, you know that's happened to my mom. and if i go to get my hair trimmed i show them how much i want taken off and make sure they understand what i mean. i'm trying to let my hair grow longer. the back i like but would love for it to be a few inches longer. it's a little past my bra strap that fastens in the back. but my sides are layered some.


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## NYAngel98 (Jul 5, 2006)

if you have severly damaged hair, yeah, the only way to get rid of the dead ends is to cut them off. BUT, you can cut of 1/4" -1/2" at a time... and as hair grows, keep cutting the same amount. Your hair will stay the same length for awhile... but its better than chopping all at once if you don't want to.


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## SerenityEludes (Jul 5, 2006)

The really foul part is that my hair wasnt damaged!



to me it was perfectly fine and healthy.I just needed a trim to get rid of the stragley ends.


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## LipglossQueen (Jul 5, 2006)

Originally Posted by *saramy* been there, done that myself. I used to get my hair done by a close friend until she said "Whose the stylist here? me or you?" thats all it took for me to go to someone else. I finally found someone who cuts just what I ask. Stylists can get pretty annoyed when you speak up about your own hair, and I agree male stylists are brilliant when it comes to cutting hair.


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## Elektrica (Jul 5, 2006)

Wow, that is just terrible. I have never experienced anything like that. Whenever my hair is long I always get compliments from stylists. Usually, I go to the hairdressers to get all my hair chopped off. I love change when it comes to my hair. Whenever I tell them that I want it short, they always saying something like, 'why do you want to do that for? You have such nice hair...' I guess its different here in Australia or something. I've always had really good experiences with salons.


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## coconut_cutie (Jul 6, 2006)

I'm not african american, nor have i ever been to any predominantly black salons, but I used to have hip length hair and yeah i experienced this long hair hating thing. Its horrible, cos i was always nervous enough about gettin my hair cut, I just feel like a lot of the time they are eager to point out whats wrong with your hair, even yelling it across the salon like someone else said, eg, 'your hairs in good condition, IF IT WASN'T FOR THESES SPLIT ENDS!!!' or 'your scalps a bit dry, WANT SOME ANTI-DANDRUFF SHAMPOO?'





But thankfully i found a wonderful hairdresser who's very complimetary and always does it just how I ask lol


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## LilDee (Jul 6, 2006)

I love male hairstylists! they're awesome





But I did find this one female hairdresser who does a lot of long curly hair, she's a sweetheart! I used to have hair down to my butt with curls (so longer when you pulled it) I was growing it out till prom.. then i went to get the split ends cut off just before prom and she cut off a lot more than i had expected.. but my hair still looked good on prom day.. i let my mommy do it for me





Now it's back to it's long length (mabey a tad shorter than before, but i like this length better) and i have the perfect hairdresser



omg i'm blabbing aren't i, lol


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## girl_geek (Jul 7, 2006)

Weird, I used to have hair down to my waist when I was in high school (though it did look kind of frayed and thin at the ends), and down to my bra strap through most of college (at this length it was thick and healthy)... but I never experienced any of the stuff in this article!

However, one time after I had cut my hair shorter (above the shoulder), I went to a stylist who I think was jealous of my thick hair! Every stylist I go to tells me "Wow, you have a lot of hair!" but this girl kept telling me it was TOO thick and thinned it out a ton even though I didn't ask her to! (And no other stylist has even offered to thin out my hair before, everyone else thinks it looks great thick!) She also cut it a lot shorter than I asked, and I ended up looking like a boy with so little hair! And this was 6 months before my wedding!



Fortunately, it grew out enough by my wedding that I was still able to have the hairstyle I wanted!





However, I think that stylist was also jealous I was getting married, because after she saw my ring she immediately asked me how much it cost (hello! none of your business!) and then went on a long rant about her ex! lol


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## Cheebs (Jul 7, 2006)

Wow, that's terrible! I usually have long hair in the winter and shorter hair in the summer but I haven't had any long hair haters around me. I love my hairstylist. He always compliments me on my hair and cuts it exactly the way I want. I also go to another hairstylist who works for him (who's female) and she's great too. She does exactly what I want.


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## econ34 (Jul 7, 2006)

i can't believe people would actually treat girls with long hair differently. i'm sure it's true and it's too bad, and if it happenes to you just know that it's because they're insecure and are jealous of your beautiful hair!


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## NYAngel98 (Jul 8, 2006)

I can't believe there are hairdressers out there that would do this...




Actually a lot of the ones out here adore long hair... I even knew of a few that almost refused to cut it and have someone else do it (also not very good business practise, but better than jealousy) because they couldn't bear to chop off so much ... A good stylist will offer suggestions, but ultimately do what the client wants. That is how you build clientele, and a reputable hairdresser should know this. You get a new client in your chair and you make her miserable by chopping off 8" when she only wants 2", and you can kiss any future $ from her goodbye. Plus she can tell her friends about her ordeal, who in turn tell their friends, etc. and before you know it you're shampooing for a dollar tip. Dumb move.



Grrr.


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## _Dreamer_ (Jul 8, 2006)

hmm i wonder if that's why my friend with hair to her butt, cuts her own hair  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />

or she's just too lazy XD


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## shyiskrazy2 (Jul 8, 2006)

I agree with the girls who said to go to a male hairdresser, if possible. They won't "hate" on you, cuz you got it goin' on or anything. The top stylists in salons (the most expensive) are ususally guys. IMO, they do a much better job of actually STYLING your hair instead of a boring-ass cut and blowdry. It's a shame that girls gotta be trying to tear each other down instead of lifting each other up, just so they can feel better.


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## emily_3383 (Jul 8, 2006)

Yeah people can be really rude, thats why i dont go to the salon as much. too much bs.


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## ivette (Jul 8, 2006)

i believe what all u girls have said. nothing suprises me anymore. some people are just

plain jerks. its just a sad part of life


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## ManiacChick2323 (Jul 9, 2006)

wow never knew stuff like that happend.


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## MBenita (Jul 9, 2006)

It happens frequently but you have to look at the quality of the salon you're visiting. SOME ethnic people still associate hair length with your status as a "sista'" or a "sister". _But that's a topic that is never resolved so I move on..._

There are usually signs if that salon (and it's stylists) are professionals...meaning if they are staring at your hair as if they've never encountered long hair before, there's a problem! Seriously!

I learned many, many years ago that if the salon does not have hair consultations prior to the appointment, I won't go. It only takes 10-minutes but the consulatation will give you a feel overall before your appointment.

It's a shame with all that IS important in the world, folks can't get pass hair! Hair doesn't make you more beautiful, richer or smarter...it's just hair!!!


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## KimC2005 (Jul 9, 2006)

I think there are stylists like this in a lot places no matter if its in an african american salon or any other salon. It's sad that they do that


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## LVA (Jul 9, 2006)

omg!! .. this is soooo true ... i used to have hair down to my pant pockets



and i went in for a trim .. looked @ the mirror, blinked a couple of times ... and wondered y my hair was now bra length



sometimes though .. .it's not necessarily that ppl who work in salon hate your lenght .. it's that they keep messing up .. .and have to keep cutting more and more ....

okie ... so my hair was bra length .. went to a different hair stylist to get it trimmed (cuz of split ends)and layered ... wow!! .. let me tell u .. i walked out of that salon went hair that was shoulder length .. i ended up having to wear it flipped out everyday .. and w/my fat face .. that did not look good...

finally found a good stylist ... and her family moves ... so now ... i'm in search of a new stylist yet again :sigh:


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## melpaganlibran (Jul 9, 2006)

god that is just plain awful! You see, I am caucasian- and I do know how women of color can be very catty with one another over the long hair thing. I had friends with long hair in high school I found myself defending verbally at times.

"It ain't real," they would snicker and say. thats bad enough but I had no idea that it extended to the salon of all places, where we are supposed to be dealing with ~ahem~ professionals!! How rude of those stylists!

I would say to the women who are the target of these insults..."hey they are just jealous that you have your hair looking nice, it is not you who has a problem, the people making nasty comments have the problem."

When possible I do love to see a woman of color with her hair in a more natural style...if she looks great with one and has it done well. I have read a little bit of "activist" literature written by peoples of color (surprise, surprise) and they seem to think that all of the pressing and long-hair weaving are sociological reactions to thinking that natural hair is not good looking hair. Don't know how to feel about that, I can find beauty in any kind of hair and don't see why the people who wrote those books think that women who press or pemr their hair are hopeless victims to mass brainwashing. hell, maybe they just like the way their hair looks a little bit straighter. We can blame society all we want or we can just chalk it up to individual prefrences.

I think that it is all about an individual woman's comfort in what she feels looks best as well as what flatters her face the best...for example I would love to have worry free shorter hair, but I know from experience that it looks awful on me.

I have seen Tyra Banks with both natural hair (like cornrows or other styles, braids, etc) and with straight hair but she is one of those rare women who has natural beauty no matter what. Not all of us, any skinshade, can be like...Tyra Banks!

I hate the word nappy, it is so ugly and rude. I will never ever use that word it is so hateful. How dare one person say something like that to no less than a Nubian Goddess in a hairstylist's chair before her?

Just ignore it, I would say.

That was interesting and thought provoking. I am sure there are plenty of nice hairdressers out there. hell, if I were in your shoes, I would complain to a manager about a particulary nasty hairdresser or just plain change salons. Money is green everywhere and if someone someplace wants to be rude when you get your hair fixed, just walk you and your money out the door!

peace and respect

mela


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## Nox (Jul 9, 2006)

Originally Posted by *melpaganlibran* god that is just plain awful! You see, I am caucasian- and I do know how women of color can be very catty with one another over the long hair thing. I had friends with long hair in high school I found myself defending verbally at times. 
"It ain't real," they would snicker and say. thats bad enough but I had no idea that it extended to the salon of all places, where we are supposed to be dealing with ~ahem~ professionals!! How rude of those stylists!

I would say to the women who are the target of these insults..."hey they are just jealous that you have your hair looking nice, it is not you who has a problem, the people making nasty comments have the problem."

When possible I do love to see a woman of color with her hair in a more natural style...if she looks great with one and has it done well. I have read a little bit of "activist" literature written by peoples of color (surprise, surprise) and they seem to think that all of the pressing and long-hair weaving are sociological reactions to thinking that natural hair is not good looking hair. Don't know how to feel about that, I can find beauty in any kind of hair and don't see why the people who wrote those books think that women who press or pemr their hair are hopeless victims to mass brainwashing. hell, maybe they just like the way their hair looks a little bit straighter. We can blame society all we want or we can just chalk it up to individual prefrences.

I think that it is all about an individual woman's comfort in what she feels looks best as well as what flatters her face the best...for example I would love to have worry free shorter hair, but I know from experience that it looks awful on me.

I have seen Tyra Banks with both natural hair (like cornrows or other styles, braids, etc) and with straight hair but she is one of those rare women who has natural beauty no matter what. Not all of us, any skinshade, can be like...Tyra Banks!

I hate the word nappy, it is so ugly and rude. I will never ever use that word it is so hateful. How dare one person say something like that to no less than a Nubian Goddess in a hairstylist's chair before her?

Just ignore it, I would say.

That was interesting and thought provoking. I am sure there are plenty of nice hairdressers out there. hell, if I were in your shoes, I would complain to a manager about a particulary nasty hairdresser or just plain change salons. Money is green everywhere and if someone someplace wants to be rude when you get your hair fixed, just walk you and your money out the door!

peace and respect

mela

True Dat, Mela!
Although, in the Af. American community, those institutionalized ideas run so deep. Those ideas were handed down since the days of slavery. And of course, the U.S. is very good about exporting all their "ish" to all corners of the globe... now African women have forgetten what it means to beautify their natural hair and they run to get perms to make it "good". It's so sad. Black women spend up to TEN TIMES ON AVERAGE what any other woman would spend on their hair because so many are chasing the dream of having "good" long hair. A lot of them walk around with scraggly ends to retain whatever length they have on their hair. And if you are a black girl growing up in a predominantly white suburb, the psychological effect is exponentially compounded. I was a girl in that situation, and even when I relaxed my hair, it still wasn't good enough for most of those folks. Thank God I found my Black soul at university and stopped chemically killing my hair. That was my motivating factor for going to a Dominican salon. Now, it's the best it has ever looked... and without chemicals too!!!


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## LipglossQueen (Jul 9, 2006)

I agree with everyone's saying but in regards to the good hair bad hair thing, 9 times out of 10 it's another black person that will bring it up, infact in general white people seem to be much more open and accepting of our varying textures then we are ourselves!


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## girl_geek (Jul 9, 2006)

Wow, I am learning a lot in this thread.... At first I thought we were talking about girls of any race hating long hair, I didn't realize this was a little different issue for some ethnicities!


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## Denicelpz (Jul 10, 2006)

This is soooooooooooooo true and about the mexican myth well they say your not to let people touch your hair because if there jealous and they touch it,your hair will fall and be a mess.I have long hair I dyed my hair almost blond and its thick but I try to take care of it.But most people are haters and they tell me your hair is so so so so thin,your hair is so so so so damaged and all these rude comments even that it doesn't look like my real hair they think its fake.My hair is not damaged,thin,or fake but people can be rude.To bad dont have picture in my profile to show you guys.


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## _Dreamer_ (Jul 10, 2006)

Originally Posted by *Denicelpz* This is soooooooooooooo true and about the mexican myth well they say your not to let people touch your hair because if there jealous and they touch it,your hair will fall and be a mess.I have long hair I dyed my hair almost blond and its thick but I try to take care of it.But most people are haters and they tell me your hair is so so so so thin,your hair is so so so so damaged and all these rude comments even that it doesn't look like my real hair they think its fake.My hair is not damaged,thin,or fake but people can be rude.To bad dont have picture in my profile to show you guys. wow there's a myth of that? that's interesting =o i never knew, i wonder if there's one like that with chinese culture  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## lynnda (Jul 10, 2006)

Wow ! I did not know this went on.


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## MBenita (Jul 10, 2006)

The one thing most people, whether ethnic or not, doesn't realize is that the texture or length of your hair has nothing to do with your loyalty or disloyalty to your race! Just as all AA does not have kinky/natural hair, all caucasians does not have straight hair.

Our races are so blended, sometimes you can't classify a race at all! So the hair thing can't be generalized into a nutshell...

I know, I know - off topic!


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## icecastles (Jul 10, 2006)

Hairstylists who don't understand 3inches vs. 10inches are the reason I avoid going to 'salons'. I let my husband trim my hair because I trust him to NOT cut off so much. He also likes my long hair and wouldn't want it cut short.

The man doesn't have a cosmetologist license but he sure does a better job of cutting my hair and listening.


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## xpress13 (Jul 12, 2006)

I've always had long hair... It's great, but also a pain... It takes a lot of work to keep it looking healthy (especially when you've got thick, curly, frizzy hair that has been fried by too much processing -- I'm still bitter, can you tell?). People who are always saying, "oh, how pretty, such long hair..." usually haven't an idea of how much time it takes to keep it looking good... or to simply get it looking right so you can go to work in the morning.

Truly, every time I go for a cut, no matter how great a condition I think my hair is in (which it was before this terrible dye incident), all the stylists recommend chopping it off. And even in the midst of discussing how I only want a trim, only want a couple inches off, they still insist on cutting double what I ask or more. Definite hair envy if you ask me. Why can't we get what we pay for? At one point I got so sick of it that I started cutting my hair myself!


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## Gwendela (Jul 12, 2006)

I know when my hair is short I'm not picky at all about who touches it but when it's long I am so afraid of someone getting scissor happy on it.

I have a friend that doesn't believe in cutting her hair and she had the hardest time finding a stylist that would perm her hair and not pester her to cut it.


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## cinnamingirl (Jul 13, 2006)

okay so i just want to say that i had no idea so many of u ladies would respond to this forum in so many ways. im so glad im not the only one out there that has had these experiences and that has concerns. i think we take too much care and spend to much time on our hair to have someone jus chop all our hard work off just to be mean and hateful. i think we should start taking action and start being firm with what we want.

LETS HEAR IT FOR THE GIRLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## NYAngel98 (Jul 13, 2006)

YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!




You said it sista!


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## yummerz (Jul 14, 2006)

[email protected] topic! I never ever would have thought about hair stylists hating on ones hair. And thinking about it now, last time I got a haircut which was back in umm, I think Nov. my hair was waaaay long and beautiful. So I walk into a salon and ask for something not too short and not too long. I got exactly what I wanted. It was pretty short though, =. I just remember the stylist saying before I got my haircut, "Yeah, long hair isn't good nowadays." I, of course, believing it said, "Really? Than let's cut it off!" After a week I soooooo regreted. It's now July and my hair lengeth is almost getting there!


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## xXxBeckyxXx (Jul 14, 2006)

Arggghhh this has happened to me for years, i hardly used to go the hairdressers because they just like to snip 5inches extra off when i want a trim! but the other month i found a hairdressers that gave me what i wanted and asked me questions step by step yayyy. Iv had long hair mostly all my life and when i was 14 it was to the top of my bum and i fancied a change, i decided i wanted it shorter so i asked for it to be a few inches below my shoulders but it was was cut a few inches above my shoulders


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## Ashley1 (Jul 15, 2006)

Wow these stories are really freaking me out I need a trim and my hair is longer now than ever. I am pretty blunt though tell the lady what you ant and make sure she's doing it. I tell them I don't want a certain scissor cut or whatever they are doing but it bothers me when they just start thinning your hair or razoring it without even asking you! People always want what they can't have.


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## akazie (Jul 16, 2006)

Wow, I am speechless.


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## rosebeauty34 (Jul 21, 2006)

The Dominican Republic was under Haitian rule for a while so that is why there is a mixture of hair textures. I can't believe some of these stories. Don't let any hair dresser treat you that way. I would never go back if I was treated badly or felt embarrased. 

I had my hair chopped off by a hair dresser even though I brought a friend with me to watch. My hair curls up and gets springy when wet so some hair dressers have too much fun cutting it and making it fuller. I cut my own hair now and had people ask where I have it cut.


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## Lafawnduh (Jul 26, 2006)

Wow, I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one that has had horrible luck with this! I've always liked keeping my hair long, but when I'd go to the hair dresser for "just a little trim" they'd go scissor happy and cut off tons of hair. I'd leave in tears sometimes because I was so upset by the drastic change.

I'm afraid to get trims at home too because my mom will accidentally cut off too much sometimes. I haven't had a trim in over 6 months because I'm afraid of too much getting snipped off.


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## pinkbundles (Jul 28, 2006)

yeah, i've seen that happen. not to that extreme, but i've seen it. it is quite awful! i don't get it either! lots of celebs use it and no one says anything.


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