# I don't know how to be single : /



## kelly24 (Dec 20, 2011)

I am new to this site, and have been looking for some advice about an issue I have been having. I am 24 years old and have to admit that I truly do not know how to be out of a relationship. My first relationship was when I was 15, and it had a very traumatic ending. After that relationship, I went on from one relationship to the next. Very unstable and unhealthy relationships. I recently broke up with my last boyfriend of 2 years (the longest relationship I have ever had). He was a great guy and I tried to stay in it because I did not want to start all over again. But I realized I was with him for all the wrong reasons... I was not in love with him and I did not want to be alone. I am going through some tough times (I moved to another city to start grad school) and I dont have many friends because my "adult life" I have spent in relationships, shutting myself off from friendships. I miss my ex boyfriend because he was always there for me, but I have no intention on getting back with him. I need to take some time off to myself and I really do not want to jump into any other relationship. It is just so hard for me to be single, Im don't feel like Im any good at it and being surrounded by family and friends that are getting married and in relationships just make things more challenging for me.

Any advice on how to be happy being single, making new friends without seeming awkward, or anything of the like would be so truly appreciated !

Thanks  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## Nella (Dec 27, 2011)

Kelly, I've been there before and the truth is you must go it alone and be uncomfortable before you can truly be alone and happy. Watch this video...it's my favorite...


 
Hope this somewhat helps. It does for me everytime I feel slightly alone.


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## divadoll (Dec 27, 2011)

There's a huge difference between being alone and being lonely.  It's a good thing to know how to be comfortable being alone without being lonely.  Not everyone has that skill but it is one of the best skills in life to have.   Relationships come and go but you will need yourself as company always.  Take the time to know yourself and love yourself.  This will also enhance what you bring forth to your next relationship(s).  If you  are only defined by your relationships, all you've got is a bunch of breakups and heartbreaks.


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## khoobsurati (Dec 27, 2011)

I know it's very hard for you to be in a relationship after what you have suffered till now in your life. But trust me, loneliness will not bring any happiness in your life because happiness comes with sharing. I am not telling you to go and have a relationship but at least you can have friends because there is no age limit to make friends. Go out and make friends. I give you an easy advice. Visit a nearest park in the morning and find a person who is sitting alone there and try to communicate with him/her. Even if he/she doesn't look interested, don't loose hope. Try anybody because there are millions out there like you who have decided to stay alone because they failed to find a true frnd.


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## Miss19 (Mar 22, 2012)

I don't like being alone when it comes to everything, I need my family and friends, but my mum always told me that you have to enjoy being alone and basically she says spending time with yourself helps to accept being alone (sounds sad), but it works, like reading a book, doing a hobby, learning a new language, praying and meditating and etc. You should give one of the things I mentioned a go and see how it goes.

Also I forgot to mention even watching tv and eating alone helps  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> Good luck


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