# Job Hunt Rant/Advice



## TwinkletOes26 (Mar 23, 2009)

Ok im looking for employment and im carless. My mother wont allow me to borrow hers without her being in it. Which is fine i dont care her car but the issue is she will for WEEKS on end say she doesnt feel like going anywhere. Well this make job hunting difficult. I have a bs in psych and i want to go to grad school. I need a job first to pay for masters courses. The issue I want to drop my resume off at several places in the nearest city(like 20 min from my house). My mother on the other had is convinced that i should EMAIL each place my resume. Now im no job hunting expert but i remember reading several articles and from my schools career center stating that if you email your resume it wont get read and if it gets read the potential employers will think that you are lazy and not serious about the job. I tried to explain this to her she wont listen. She says shes not riding up and down the road "helter skelter". Its three places i wanna drop my resume off. I would gladly ride a bus BUT there is no bus system in my little town. The only way to get anywhere is to drive.Ive already put my resume up on yahoo and monster but no call backs. I think the only way to get a job is to show up in person.

My mother always says she wants my hand out of her purse and in my own BUT wont let me borrow the car and she wont ride in her car to go job hunting bc she "doesnt feel like it". So how am i suppose to get a job when i cant get to a place to even give anyone my resume?

Ok done venting going to go cook dinner.


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## Annelle (Mar 23, 2009)

Welll, I'm not sure how much this will help, as without reliable transportation to be able to even drop off a resume, I don't know how you'll be able to tell your employers that you'll be able to make it to work reliably either (is your mom willing to drop you off/pick you up every day if you do get a job?)

But you should get rid of your idea that an e-mailed resume is a sign of laziness!!

An e-mailed resume is fine as long as you don't cut out any of the professional steps! Do a professional cover letter in your e-mail -- proper grammar and formal letter format. Try to get an actual person's e-mail address and do full responses and follow ups. (I like the final paragraph to be something along the lines of "Here's my contact info, and I will follow up with you by this-and-this date to verify you have received my resume" and then CALL them by that date.)

The problem with e-mail is a lot of people do get lazy, use bad grammar and spelling as if they were trying to chat with one of their friend's "hi do u have anyj obs?" Instead of "Dear Ms. Conner, I am aware that you are accepting applications for the position of ____. I have a Bachelor's Degree in Psychology from the University of __, and I believe I would be a good fit for your company. (yadda yadda)" As long as your first impression is professional, and you follow up professionally, you should be fine.

The internet has been around long enough for it to be considered part of the main stream business world -- you shouldn't have to worry that it makes you less professional to use e-mail! Just make sure you stay professional within the e-mails as well, and you should be fine! OH remember your e-mail address is part of your first impression. Make sure you send from a "boring" address like [email protected] instead of an address like "[email protected]"


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## christy271987 (Mar 23, 2009)

omg, thats EXACTLY the way my mom is only she's worse to me and I can't drive her car because it's a standard, but I had to pay a friend of hers gas money to take me to pick up applications and drop them off and go to interviews, it sucks big time and its a bad feeling when your own mother won't help you out but you have to rely on someone who cares more, at least you care enough to go out and try and find a job, you know how old I was when I got my first job because of her? I was 20, I don't have a car either and I work in a restaurant answering the telephone now but I'm working on going back to college soon so I can make something out of myself and hopefully I'll be someone my children will look up to, I'm not trying to low-rate my mom but she hasn't been the best mother to me and she's a single mom, my father died when I was just hardly 2 years old, I wish I made enough money at my job to move out so I could get away from her but I'm stuck until I can get a car or another job that pays better.

I'm not trying to say that your mom doesn't care about you because she probably does but I know mine doesn't and I could care less, if she can't help you get one of your friends or somebody in your family to help you out until someone hires you, explain your situation to them, they'll understand, I'm sorry if you didnt' want to hear this but I hope you find the job you really want. good luck


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## TwinkletOes26 (Mar 23, 2009)

sadly christy all my friends live far away (in atl) i live two hours away from atl so yea




...i suppose ill just email my resume out maybe someone will hire me.

My family members dont talk to each other bc my grandmothr has been successful in turning all her kids and grandkids against each other.

Ive been home almost a year its been miserable. My graduation day was hell. My aunt and grandmother DINED AND DASHED not kidding and my mother spent all day and night yelling at my stepdad about sitting next to my aunt at the dinner table. To make matters worse i ordered an ice cream cake from dairy queen and she wouldnt get it bc she said she was "too angry" at my stepdad to pick it up.

I know she cares shes just controlling as hell. I think part of it is she knows that when i start working she cant order me around to clean up and cook anymore. Shell have to do it. Even though i get told every other day that there is something wrong with what i cook...thas funny bc when i was at college when i would cook none of my roomies or my friends had any complaints...the only person who has an issue with my cooking is her.

She claims that she tries to help but she does nothing but dictate and put anything i say or do down. When i first started selling avon she would always have somethin negative to say about anything i did. Id make a flyer and shed say there was something wrong with it. She even told me that no one white would buy any avon from me bc i was black



. As a child she would always put my personality down saying i was too social and talked to much. This coming from her the queen of the phone she stays on the phone all darn day. She wants to make me a little her and it aint gonna happen. Im not like her at all. Im outgoing and like to hang out with people. She on the other hand doesnt like to have lunch with friends she didnt even go to her friend's house warming party.

Part of the reason i graduated so late is bc she made me go to a two yr then transfer to a four yr. Well this screwed me up big time bc he school i transfered to required all the extracurricular courses and two yrs of a language. My classes from my two yr half didnt count



.

She never invites anyone over because she swears people would just be coming to see whats in our house and to be nosey. Shes uber paranoid she always thinks that people are talking about her. She would even accused me and my friends of talking about her. They would talk about her bc she would listen on the phone to what we were talking about and i was 23 or 24 at the time why is a 50 somethingyr old worried what a bunch of 20 somethings are talking about.

When me and my exfiance first got together she told me a 24 yr old if i was having sex with him to STOP IT RIGHT NOW. We had only been dating a week. I swear in her mind she thinks im a skank. When i was 10 he made me take a pregnancy test bc my period was 2 days late. Ok i am gonna stop typing bc i feel myself tearing up...

Originally Posted by *Annelle* /img/forum/go_quote.gif Welll, I'm not sure how much this will help, as without reliable transportation to be able to even drop off a resume, I don't know how you'll be able to tell your employers that you'll be able to make it to work reliably either (is your mom willing to drop you off/pick you up every day if you do get a job?)
But you should get rid of your idea that an e-mailed resume is a sign of laziness!!

An e-mailed resume is fine as long as you don't cut out any of the professional steps! Do a professional cover letter in your e-mail -- proper grammar and formal letter format. Try to get an actual person's e-mail address and do full responses and follow ups. (I like the final paragraph to be something along the lines of "Here's my contact info, and I will follow up with you by this-and-this date to verify you have received my resume" and then CALL them by that date.)

The problem with e-mail is a lot of people do get lazy, use bad grammar and spelling as if they were trying to chat with one of their friend's "hi do u have anyj obs?" Instead of "Dear Ms. Conner, I am aware that you are accepting applications for the position of ____. I have a Bachelor's Degree in Psychology from the University of __, and I believe I would be a good fit for your company. (yadda yadda)" As long as your first impression is professional, and you follow up professionally, you should be fine.

The internet has been around long enough for it to be considered part of the main stream business world -- you shouldn't have to worry that it makes you less professional to use e-mail! Just make sure you stay professional within the e-mails as well, and you should be fine! OH remember your e-mail address is part of your first impression. Make sure you send from a "boring" address like [email protected] instead of an address like "[email protected]"


Im glad things have changed lol..i just am going off what i read and what i was told by the career center at college although the lady doing the seminar was kinda old LOL. Well emailing is easier than having to wrestle with my mother to go places. Thank you for your help... I dont know what im gonna do once i get a job i guess shes ride with me and stay all day until i leave. I have no clue...ive brought that up and she just gets mad she cant ever discuss things in a rational matter without getting angry she HAS to be right all the time lol...

Thank you so much for clearing that up ill start on my cover letter tonight and email my resume off asap.


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## Adrienne (Mar 23, 2009)

There is certainly no problem with emailing your resume like mentioned above. In fact, tons of companies actually prefer being emailed as it is much easier. The only problem is that one of the first things employers ask is "Do you have means of transportation?" You need to come up with some sort of stable way to get to your job undependent from your mom. If not, I'm sure that you'll interview or first day of work will come and you either won't be on time or won't show up at all and then that's one job where you surely won't be asked to reschedule. You don't want to burn any bridges right now and especially not with the way our economy is right now.


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## TwinkletOes26 (Mar 23, 2009)

i wonder if a womens shelter would help me out with transportation or is there a program yall know of that will help



?


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## Orangeeyecrayon (Mar 23, 2009)

i dont know of any transportation ideas. and i do not know the fine details of applying for jobs in the proffesional sectre, but i would assume emailing your ressume and at least getting it out there would be better than doing nothing at all.


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## Rotting Beauty (Mar 25, 2009)

I suck at giving advice, but maybe it's just me, but your mom sounds a bit schizophrenic. She might be?


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## TwinkletOes26 (Mar 25, 2009)

i think she may have a cross between borderline personality disorder or narcassitic personality disorder. She does crap and then when i bring it up she acts like its not important,im petty or crazy to bring it up or just doesnt remember. Like she claims she doesnt remember screaming at me in the grocery store when we went to pick up the pregnancy test(i was 10 mind you ). She does "remember" making me take the pregnancy test her excuse(bc theres always one bc shes ALWAYS right) is that an 11 yr old that yr got knocked up by a 13 yr old. So in her mind she was justified.

She was justified in trying to make me break up with my hs bf bc he was another race than me. She swears she doesnt remember that. Again she needs counseling ive known that ish for YEARS like back when i was 14 i knew she needed counseling but she thinks shes fine.

I have read up on these disorders and i know even though i rant about her that im responsible only for MY behavior not hers.For a while i felt traped bc i had to take 2 courses online at home to graduate bc my college didnt tell me i ws mmissing them until the WEEK OF graduation. SO i technically finished school in oct. So now every time she starts to act up i just think ill rant to my mu buddies (bc i cant talk on the phone to friends SHE LISTENS AT THE DOOR im not kidding) and work harder on getting a job hence retweeking my resume and handing them back out.

I really am trying to get a job...i dont want anyone to think im lazy by any means it just sucks bad. Id work at a burger joint BUT i live in a small area and all the kids that didnt go to college (which were quite a few) took up jobs at the burger placesso they arent hiring bc they have lots of workers. I was even told by burger king i was OVER qualified(aka they knew the moment i could id find a better job) so ill just keep trucking along.

Thank u guys for listening


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## makeupbycat (Mar 25, 2009)

The only advice I can give you is to grow up and start felling secure of the things you can do. Even if that means getting out there and asking somebody else to give you a ride to the nearest city, I’m sure one of you neighbors goes or work in the city don’t they? Girl! Your mother is old and she already lived her life, now is your turn! Don’t let her control you like a puppet, you are 27yrs old! Not only you have a degree but you have a whole life to live. Read self help books so that you can realize that you can do anything you put your mind into. Have faith and take action. Yes emailing resumes is Ok , try going into the companies website, they usually have the application there as well so that you can submitted online. Good Luck and have a happy Life


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## TwinkletOes26 (Mar 25, 2009)

makeupbycat....i know i have to live my life. I mean ive only been home since may. B4 i was living on campus enjoying my life. I can count on one hand the number of times i cried while at school here its every other week. I know i must get away from her. None of my neighbors work in macon. All the men work at ga power in town and most of the ladies work at the local school or stay at home moms.

My mother yesterday claimed she was gonna buy me a car when i get a job...then a few moments later recanted and said id have to buy my own and i could borrow hers....som how i think when it comes time to actually go to work shell take back what she said. So i am as of now looking into seeing if i can borrow my grandmas car im hoping that shell say yes just bc she knows how mad it will make my mom lol...or my uncle who sales cars could help me out.

It just gets hard bc at college i was considered the level heaed one and people would come to me for advice. I get home and my mom and step father think im a complete idiot bc i dont think the way they do.If all else fails when i find a job i can tell my story to one of my friends parents and maybe they will let me stay with them and borrow a car until i can get my own and move



.


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## missmignonne (Mar 25, 2009)

I'll be praying for you.


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## colormeup (Mar 27, 2009)

Times are tough. No, it's not just you, it's a lot of people having trouble finding work.


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## TwinkletOes26 (Mar 27, 2009)

Worse is the only place hiring around me right now is ....the neon cowboy yes IMAGINE in your mind what kind of place it is...ill give you a hint its full of poles and my mama would KILL me for even looking at that place LOL


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## Orangeeyecrayon (Mar 27, 2009)

if places are telling you that you are over qualified than why dont you leave your college education of your application to places like burger king and such.

i hate to say it, but if you really want to find a job you need to be proactive. esspecially in an economic climate like this a job is not just going to fall into your lap.

also you chose a really hard carrer to break into, with a bs in psyche you are not fully qualified to work in that field, people usually look for someone with at least a masters


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## _withoutYou (Mar 27, 2009)

Twinklet, you have to realize that your mother doesn't define you, YOU define who YOU are, you are your own person. YOU have a lot of potential, I'm sure you know that, use it to your advantage. My mother sounds a lot yours, some of us are put in these situations that we can't get out of so we just have to deal with it anyway that works, and by dealing I don't mean starting a world war 3, there are ways so that both people are happy.


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## TwinkletOes26 (Mar 30, 2009)

Originally Posted by *Orangeeyecrayon* /img/forum/go_quote.gif if places are telling you that you are over qualified than why dont you leave your college education of your application to places like burger king and such.
i hate to say it, but if you really want to find a job you need to be proactive. esspecially in an economic climate like this a job is not just going to fall into your lap.

also you chose a really hard carrer to break into, with a bs in psyche you are not fully qualified to work in that field, people usually look for someone with at least a masters

I am well aware jobs dont fall out of the sky which is why i have been looking high and low for work. I would gladly leave my college education off my resume BUT its a small town everyone KNOWS i went to college lol. Especially since people hiring are former classmates lol.

I by no means want anyone to think im lazy but all i can do is email places my resume since i can not go there because i have no car. My mother claims she will buy me a car when i find work but shes said stuff like that before like when i graduated from college shed buy me a car here i am with a bs and still no car so i take what she says with a grain of salt.

I am not qualified to counsel anyone but there are several other jobs i could do. My main goal is to get a job so i can pay for grad courses at 500-1000 dollars a course i NEED a job if i am to continue my education.


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