# Just call me Loser, folks



## Xexuxa (Nov 12, 2005)

I probably shouldnt be talking about this on the internet, but I feel that this is a safe place to vent it so I'm gonna go for it...

I've recently met a really nice guy who is funny, sweet, and caring person and I'm absolutely terrified to talk to him. I sit next to him in class and I added him on myspace (yeah Im THAT cool), but when it comes to talking to him in person I just can't seem to do it  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />

I have very little social poise and I have this huge fear that I'll end up making an ass out of myself in front of him, which has happened sooo many times.

So my question is, can anyone give me any recommendations on how to shake off the jitters? haha I feel like such a kid asking this but I'm young and could use some good advice. Its a very general question I know, but what do you guys do when you want to get to know someone without making it obvious? I appreciate the help, thanks.


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## MACGoddess (Nov 12, 2005)

Has he ever talked to you in class? Does he ever strike up a convo?

I would say take deep breaths and realize that while he is a hot guy, he is juts a guy, just like anyone else you know... You have to be yourself, I know you are a fantastic girl!! I am sure that if you just realize that this guy, even though he is all the wonderful things you said he is, is NOT the end all of you life...

You are young and will meet bunches of guys in your lifetime, so even if you do feel a little silly around him, it isn't the end of the world, I promise... Just be your sweet self, and I think he'll come around, if he doesn't he DEFINITELY isn't worth your valuable time sweetie!


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## Xexuxa (Nov 12, 2005)

Great advice. You are right, he isnt he only one, so I have no reason to get so bashful. He is a fairly chatty guy, and hes real nice, but he won't be the last. Thanks, that really helped  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## girl_geek (Nov 12, 2005)

I am naturally shy myself... I would recommend just talking to him as you would any other friend or aquaintence, and once you both get to know each other then you can figure out if you want the relationship to grow.... Do you find yourself having a hard time talking in any social situation or just around a guy you like? Because unless you have some sort of diagnosable anxiety disorder, the only way to get over being shy is just continue to come out of your shell and talk to people, and it will get better with time! Easier said than done, I know  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />

I was super-shy in high school, but I became more social in college because I was meeting new people that had no preconceptions about me so I wasn't worried about what they would think of me! (I was a nerd in my small high school so I was never able to get out of that stereotype but no one had to know that in college  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />) Going far away on an internship also really helped my social skills -- all of us interns were there alone without any friends, so we were all forced to talk to each other and hang out together unless we wanted to sit at home alone each night!  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> However I still don't consider myself a social person, but I can at least talk to people without feeling too nervous now!


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## MACGoddess (Nov 13, 2005)

You're welcome sweetie! I am glad I could help a little...

I was just like you in school until I graduated from High School... Once I did, I realized that I could just be myself and if someone didn't like me, or if I was made an ass out of myself in front of someone it isn't a big deal. There are plenty of other people that will like me, and if someone is so arrogant that they can hold it against me that I was a doofus in front of them, then I don't want to be around them. They are obviously too stuck up for me!

Since I decided that and changed my life, I have had a LOT more fun, and met some really amazing people that have become close friends... Plus I met my sexy fiancee!! :icon_love


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## Marisol (Nov 13, 2005)

Jennifer and Leila have given you some awesome advice!


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## Lil_Claude (Nov 30, 2005)

I have the same problem, an ugly guy (or at least i guy i think if ugly) i can practically make him fall in love with me because i am so relaxed and carefree, then when i meet a hot guy i go mute and blank and i totally blow it. I have just recently noticed that about me. So my only advice to you is when you talk to him try to blank out the fact that he's hot and you like him and talk to him just like you would talk to the other guy sitting next you that you don't like. Hopefully that helps. Sorry i need help too, lol.


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## mac-whore (Nov 30, 2005)

great advice everyone. i'm the exact same way, i'm naturally shy.. but, occasionally.. i'll find interest in someone and usually what breaks the ice for me is.. start off small, sounds corny but, ask for the time.. lol or something of that nature.. once you realize that talking to him isn't as terrifying as your telling yourself it is.. you guys will be talking in no time.. or maybe he'll strike up a convo from there.. never know until ya try. good luck girlie.


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## Xexuxa (Dec 1, 2005)

This is all great davice, I just need to find a reason to hang out with him outside of class without looking like a stalker. Wish me luck ;P


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## Killah22 (Jan 16, 2006)

You said that he is chatty, so if you sit next to him, strike up a conversation.....and that way you can get to know some of the things he's interested in. Be like, by the way......have you seen the preview of this movie coming out? and from there yall probably can make a date to go see it together. 

But, shoot.....let him make the first move if he's interested in you. Just be yourself. I would just ignore him, come to school everyday looking so sexy, and I bet he would walk right up to you wanting to get to know you better. Like I said before in one of my post, guys like a challenge. Don't run after him, let him chase you.


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## Pauline (Jan 30, 2006)

Hi Xexuxa, don't be so hard on yourself girl! It's only natural to get the jitter's,especially if you are attracted to someone...all those chemical's rushing around your brain and body will have an effect. Like the other ladies said take a deep breath to calm your nerves and act as though he was just a friend. Be natural...show your lovely self. He could be feeling exactly the same way about you.Good Luck.


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