# Tres embarassing but....



## HairEgo (Feb 18, 2009)

So I havent really had any luck in the dating department in my life...at all!! I have to be very outgoing in my line of work which usually means, in my down time i'm pretty laid back and somewhat quiet. Anyway, after my last relationship ended in December, I decided to try the whole 'online dating' scene...in my line of work I dont have the opportunity to meet a lot of straight men so I figured, whats there to lose? So I started chatting with this guy who is admitedly a bit geeky and shy....hes 26 and is just now experiencing a lot of the 'firsts' that you normally do in your teens or early 20's....he's been really honest with me and has stated he really likes me and thinks we should meet in person...I've also been fairly upfront about certain things that some men may find unattractive...ie..i'm not a skinny girl, I'm definetly plus sized. He says hes cool with it and it doesnt matter but I cant help but feel insecure about meeting him..like I said, I've never done this online thing and don't really know how it works or how you're supposed to feel...is it silly to be insecure about something he has stated that is totally fine with him?


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## Ozee (Feb 18, 2009)

I think meet him, worst thing that can happen is you or he realise you don't want to take it further.

If you put it off and keep talking behind the computer screen deeper feelings may happen and you could get even more scared of it not working.

Your photos so far show you as an absolute knock out hun, your personality is great too.

Just wanted to add shyguys are cute! I married a manwhore (not said in mean way) basically lol sometimes i wish i found a shyguy.


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## Darla (Feb 18, 2009)

Good luck on the dating front. I have no clue how the online dating things work, but i would think you would want it to be at a public place where you both arrive by yourself. That way if this doesn't work out you can always leave.

About the weight thing I think you are being kind of hard on yourself. Some guys will dismiss someone overweight without a doubt, but most guys become less shallow as time goes on. Attractiveness is not all about a dress size. I think the important thing is what you have in common and how you both feel about each other.

If the guy is older and inexperienced that is fine.


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## Dragonfly (Feb 18, 2009)

I haven't tried to date on line - it must be a bit nerve raking meeting someone for the first time, after you have talked on the computer.

But try not to be hard on yourself. You have a very pretty face and your personality really shines here!

Plus - you did tell him about your physique and he said it doesn't matter to him.

One of my rules - believe what a guy says as he usually means it.

Why not set up a luncheon date for the first meeting. If it goes well, then you can meet again.

If not, then after an hour you can say good by and move on.

Let us know how the meeting went!


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## pinksugar (Feb 18, 2009)

I agree with Oz,

maybe send some full length photos of yourself if you're concerned?


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## Aprill (Feb 18, 2009)

You will find that men find the mind a hell of alot more attractive than the size of your waist. As long as he knows, if he says he is cool with it, then he is cool with it. Being plus sized is definitely not a dealbreaker for alot of men. You are beautiful!!!

Besides, if weight bothers him, he aint the one


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## HairEgo (Feb 18, 2009)

Thanks everyone for your advice...

I guess I was just a bit freaked out because in a *normal* situation, the reason you initally start talking to someone is becuase your attracted to them...which gets the whole looks issue outta the way...but this online thing is the complete opposite...you get to know someones personality before you're really farmiliar with their looks....I mean sure, you swap pics, but who's realistically gonna post a bad pic of themselves...you know? Meh, I'm not gonna worry...


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## S. Lisa Smith (Feb 19, 2009)

Just do it!! You will be fine either way. I know folks that met through computer dating and are happily married.


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## HairEgo (Feb 19, 2009)

Thanks Lisa...yeah we're gonna meet up Saturday!


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## Darla (Feb 19, 2009)

you know in some ways it is really good to meet someone online and really talk about things before you ever meet face to face. You can learn a lot about each other and really figure out if you have anything in common before you meet. I think the real benefit is the first date isn't so superficial. Let's face it first dates are more about figuring out things about the person you are with. If you've done some of that already then it is easier when you first meet (IMO)


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## laurafaye (Feb 19, 2009)

I met my boyfriend over the internet and I was terrified, but it all worked out and we've been together for 2 and a half years so..



Plus if you've already mentioned your concerns to him and he doesn't mind then just go for it!


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## HairEgo (Feb 19, 2009)

Originally Posted by *Darla* /img/forum/go_quote.gif you know in some ways it is really good to meet someone online and really talk about things before you ever meet face to face. You can learn a lot about each other and really figure out if you have anything in common before you meet. I think the real benefit is the first date isn't so superficial. Let's face it first dates are more about figuring out things about the person you are with. If you've done some of that already then it is easier when you first meet (IMO) Thats what he said last night! I was some what of a serial dater for a while but have really been the polar opposite lately....its just nerves im sure!


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## Darla (Feb 19, 2009)

so have you talked on the phone yet?


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## HairEgo (Feb 19, 2009)

Originally Posted by *Darla* /img/forum/go_quote.gif so have you talked on the phone yet? Actually, no..okay thats a bit weird isnt it? He told me hes not much of a phone person....hmmm....


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## Darla (Feb 19, 2009)

well i would say talk to him before you date him. Does he live far from you? (a days travel by car?)

he doesn't live with his mother does he? jk


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## HairEgo (Feb 19, 2009)

Originally Posted by *Darla* /img/forum/go_quote.gif well i would say talk to him before you date him. Does he live far from you? (a days travel by car?) 
he doesn't live with his mother does he? jk

lol no, but he does live with his sister! Nah, he lives 45 mins away from me


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## Karren (Feb 19, 2009)

Ask him about his taste in womens clothing.. And if he seems to knows too much.. Be vewy vewy afwaid!! Lol. Not that I picked girl friends because we wore the same size!! Noooo.. Not me!!





Just be careful!!


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## Darla (Feb 19, 2009)

Don't let Karren scare you off CDs make great boyfriends. Good luck on your date, i missed the entry that Saturday you are getting together.


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## ticki (Feb 28, 2009)

So did you guys meet last weekend? How did the date go? Come on, dish it out! Inquiring minds want to know.


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## HairEgo (Feb 28, 2009)

Originally Posted by *ticki* /img/forum/go_quote.gif So did you guys meet last weekend? How did the date go? Come on, dish it out! Inquiring minds want to know. Nope, I wish sick in the hospital. I honestly don't know, I'm thinking im gonna stick to 'original' dating. The more that I think about it, its a scary thought really. You can be anyone you want to be over the internet....i'm a risk taker but I think i'll have to pass on this one!


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## reesesilverstar (Feb 28, 2009)

Awwww hun... I say if you're not yet comfortable to take the plunge, then take your time. Do you guys still talk online though, or have you brushed him off?


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## HairEgo (Feb 28, 2009)

Originally Posted by *reesesilverstar* /img/forum/go_quote.gif Awwww hun... I say if you're not yet comfortable to take the plunge, then take your time. Do you guys still talk online though, or have you brushed him off? No, I've totally brushed him off. :s I'll have to talk to him eventually but I just dont know how to tell someone i'm not that into them when I havent even met the person...I mean...does it even need to be said at this point?


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## S. Lisa Smith (Feb 28, 2009)

Originally Posted by *HairEgo* /img/forum/go_quote.gif No, I've totally brushed him off. :s I'll have to talk to him eventually but I just dont know how to tell someone i'm not that into them when I havent even met the person...I mean...does it even need to be said at this point?

Oh well, nothing ventured, nothing gained...keep trying. Don't they say You have to kiss a ton of frogs before you get a prince?


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## HairEgo (Feb 28, 2009)

Originally Posted by *S. Lisa Smith* /img/forum/go_quote.gif Oh well, nothing ventured, nothing gained...keep trying. Don't they say You have to kiss a ton of frogs before you get a prince? They do, but i'm getting tired of kissing frogs!


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## sweetnsexy6953 (Mar 1, 2009)

I honestly say just do it. To be honest I met my boyfriend through yahoo messenger. I was in a chat room one night and this guy and I started talking and we exchanged numbers and here we are 3 years later. Whats it gonna hurt? Just meet in a public place and you drive yourself and if you dont want to be there anymore, you can just leave. Have dinner and go from there. Like he said weight is not an issue for him. If you already like his personality than why not meet him. He could be "the one".....ya never know.

Good Luck Hun!


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## katana (Mar 1, 2009)

You'll be fine






Let us know how it goes for you...


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