# When life makes a habit of pissing you off



## Asocialisten (Nov 10, 2010)

Do you know what really makes a day go from bad to worse?

The police knocking on your door to inform you that your Dad just .. dropped dead while walking on the street. He was 69 years old.

This happened yesterday, just after my bank declined my loan. Shitty day. Now I don't have the money to pay my bills and my beloved Dad is dead.

I miss him. I'm the only one left in the family that cares about him, so I have to take care of his funeral. I'm 18 years old. How is this fair? Why do I have to have such a hard life? I thought everything was finally going to be okay. I've been abused since I was a little girl, I just survived breast cancer, I can't have a normal job because of my depression, and now this ...

He was supposed to come to my wedding. He was so happy that his little girl found a good man. And he promised to visit me on Christmas eve this year.

I just want to go to bed and hope that this is a nightmare, and that I'll wake up tomorrow, and everything will be perfectly normal.

I'm THIS close to a nervous breakdown right now.


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## jewele (Nov 10, 2010)

I'm sorry........I know hearing that doesn't change anything but after reading your post that's how I feel. Your situations haven't happened to me but I think I feel the same way you do. I'm on the verge of completely just loosing it. I really do not care to be here anymore, I could drop dead today myself and it really wouldn't bother me one bit. It is like why do I have to be feeling this way, why is this happening to me??!! So even though we have different situations you are not alone in having these feelings. I wish I could have an answer to fix it all but I don't. I am here though if you need to talk to somebody. Sometimes getting a strangers point of view can help....


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## internetchick (Nov 10, 2010)

Aaww honey I am so sorry.


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## Asocialisten (Nov 10, 2010)

I'm just so stressed right now. I've been running around all day, being a grade A housewife. I don't think our apartment has ever been so clean.
It helps me. Makes me focus on something else.

Maybe I just need some time to realise that my daddy is not coming back.


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## llehsal (Nov 10, 2010)

I am so sorry.  I know exactly how you feel and feel the same way currently.  I believe (and I know its not true)  that I am alone and that everyone else around me and is happy living a great life.  I like Jewele feel like I could drop dead and it won't matter to me.  But I have some hope that things would turn out for the best at some point.  Please pm me if you need to talk at any point....I am in no way a professional, but you can vent with me if you like.


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## Asocialisten (Nov 11, 2010)

It's so nice to see that there's people out there that cares. Thank you so much for your replies.


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## Karren (Nov 11, 2010)

Awww   I am so sorry....  I remember when my parents passed....  so I know exactually what your going through.....


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## divadoll (Nov 11, 2010)

In these situations, you just have to count your blessings.  I read that you are getting married to a man that is worthy of your father.  That's something.  Life throws us for a loop to make us appreciate what we still have.  I'm sorry for your loss, honey.  Things will get better.


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## Asocialisten (Nov 15, 2010)

Great news, you guys. I think my luck is turning.

I won a vacation to London and about 9 million DKK.

I totally deserved this.


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## sweetnsexy6953 (Dec 5, 2010)

Im so so so sorry to hear about your dad hun! Id be completely devastated if something like that ever happened to me. Im very happy to hear that you survived breast cancer. You are very fortunate!! I hope that since you won a vacation to London that it helped you focus on the stuff you need to focus on. GL hun!


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## Bexy (Dec 5, 2010)

I am so sorry for your loss, I recently lost my mother and lost my dad just a year and a half ago. They were only 58 and 60 years old. I too was devastated and thanfully I had great friends, my kids and my husband that helped me to see that life does go on. I know that my parents are looking down on me and your dad is too. Take care, enjoy your vacation and just breathe.


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## Asocialisten (Feb 15, 2011)

I must say that it still hurts, but it helps to know that I was one of the last things he thought about. I was recently told by one of his friends that my name was the last thing he said. I hope he's still here somehow, and that he is proud of me.


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## magosienne (Feb 16, 2011)

I'm so sorry for your loss  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> I'm sure your dad was proud of you. Enjoy your vacation to London, you definitely need some fresh air.


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## dixiewolf (Feb 19, 2011)

It never goes away, but it will get much better. My dad was murdered when I was 11, and there are times when I am just talking about him, and I burst into tears, but it is very rare these days. People think you get over it, (I am 33 now by the way) but you dont, you just learn to live with it. But the massive pain goes away, and I know I will see him again. The best thing is to let out your feelings while it is still new, I didnt speak of him and kept it in for years. I went to therapy and thought I was ok, but years later, something snapped and I had a breakdown (a lot of stress was going on in my life then between work and a horrible breakup.) I lost so much weight I got really sick. I had put aside my feelings for so many years and all of sudden I remembered every detail of that day and it was like reliving it. Everyone has bad days, I have days where I wish I was just not here anymore, not b/c of that, but b/c of major depression and anxiety. I do the best I can do. It's worth it to stick around and have wonderful days too  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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