# Men are f*cking stupid!



## Kimmers86 (Feb 19, 2007)

This is going to be a vent.

UGH! Okay, so here I am crying. My husband, who is being a total idiot right now, is chewing me out over text messages because I don't have friends and I want to spend time with him.

Let my clarify with a little story.

Today he was going to do some stuff with his friends, so I went along so he could drop me off at my parents house so I could spend some time with them. He was supposed to be gone like two hours-ish. Two and a half hours pass, I call him up to see when he's going to pick me up. He informs me that they got "busy" at his stupid friends house, so they are just NOW doing what they set out to do. Fine. So two more hours pass, I call him again, I am getting really bored and sick of my nagging mother at this point. He is still busy, why am I being such a *****? WHOA!? I'ma *****? Soooo I tell him to forget, I beg my brother to drive me home (20 minute drive both ways), and I go home. I talk to him again, like 6 hours after he initiall dropped me off, and now they're going to go out to eat. So now I'm REALLY getting pissed. I was just about to make us dinner, so I go and forget all about that. Okay, so just now, he texts me and says "they all want me to go back to dumbasses house for a while" (the dumbass is my input, of course). And I say "what's your point?" and he's like "I don't want you to be anymore mad at me" and I go "well obviously you're going to do what you want or you would've just come home". Right? So basically, I spent a few hours with my family until my mom started being a *****. Then I've spent the rest of the day and night alone. And I'm the ***** because I don't have any friends and I want to see him? WHAT THE HELL!?!?!?! When will he grow up!? 

Sorry to make that so long...but god I'm so mad! I could just strangle him!


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## jessimau (Feb 19, 2007)

Ugh, men are SOO dumb sometimes! I'm sorry hon! *hug*


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## Kimmers86 (Feb 19, 2007)

Thanks. He doesn't even care that I'm upset...it's always my fault and I'm always over reacting. I could just scream.


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## MissMissy (Feb 19, 2007)

my boyfriend was doing htis about two years ago he almost lost me he went out everynight till 6am i had curfew stilll lived at hom so i had to go home about midnight i would come over the next day he would not wake up so he got pissed when i would try and wake him up one day i threw water o him.. he got pissed and walked out back to piss **the bathrrom worked fine he ignored me i threw the cup at him that had water in it he tried to PEE ON ME! That is when i had it! I told him to call me when he was ready to be with me! He has not ever done it since. His friends hate me though!

I tol dhim he was choosing his friends over me. And stepping on mem i told him i didnt feel important and im sure i threw some tears at him!


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## Jessica (Feb 19, 2007)

What an @$$. I would be soooo pissed off. I have no problem with Dave going out and I am ok if he loses a little track of time. Come on though....he should've come home for dinner or brought you out for dinner and gave you some flowers. Oh yeah i would make him bow down and beg for my forgiveness LMAO. It doesn't matter if you have friends or not..... you shouldn't feel you have to get his schedule to squeeze in some time for your wife. I'm sorry kimmers!!!


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## sooner_chick (Feb 19, 2007)

People can be so mean with their insecurties and low - self esteem. I am so sorry he did you like that.


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## Gwendela (Feb 19, 2007)

My husband is one of those men that have no sense of time. He used to go to help his uncle with a project and come home four hours later. :scared: It took years of getting it through his head that he was being rude.

I do feel for you though dear because he isn't respecting you. I don't think you would be as mad at him if he wasn't being a total turd about it.


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## TheCure911 (Feb 19, 2007)

im sorry i go through the same shit sometimes


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## Kimmers86 (Feb 19, 2007)

Yeah....he doesn't think he's being a jerk. So I just got off the phone with him and guess what we solved...nothing. I just cried and told him I'm sorry. Like always. I have no spine.


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## jessimau (Feb 19, 2007)

No, that's not true, you just want some kind of peace instead of an ongoing fight! Don't beat yourself up for saying sorry. It probably would be a good idea to talk about the concept of basic respect for others' time with him. I've had to have that conversation with my boyfriend about 8 million times but he mostly gets it now. I told him that by not being somewhere when he says he will and by disappearing for hours, it's disrespectful to me and makes me feel like he doesn't care about me. It took a few times of having that same conversation, but like I said, he finally gets it.


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## KimC2005 (Feb 19, 2007)

I know how you feel. We have had this situation happen a few times. Seems like a simple phone call would be a good solution right? Or just simply informing you way ahead of time that hey, I am going to be gone for several hours tonight, but we will do something on this day.. I think sometimes guys have NO concept of time. Daniel never thought he was being rude until I explained to him just how incredibly disrespectful it was.. It is a huge pet peeve of mine. I hope things work out okay for you guys.. Just try to talk to him about it when you guys are both more calm.


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## Dragonfly (Feb 19, 2007)

I feel for you Kimmers.

Someones needs to remind him that he is married, and his priorities are with you.

However, one thing I know about men is they need time for friends, time to be alone, and time for their partner.

You mentioned that you don't have a lot of friends. Why not have mom come to your place instead. Then she can leave after a few hours instead of hanging around and criticizing your relationship?

What about getting a pet, or taking a course to keep you busy?

Just some ideas. Hope things get better - make sure he understands how hurt you are, with his behaviour.


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## ivette (Feb 19, 2007)

i'm sorry you had a bad day.


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## Tina Marie (Feb 19, 2007)

Well put!


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## Kimmers86 (Feb 19, 2007)

Thanks everyone! I tried explaining to him how it's rude what he does, but he just turns it around on me. It's so exhausting. Since I don't have friends (lonnnng story on that one, won't go into it) He doesn't get it. If I did the same thing to him he'd be upset, but I never have....so he doesn't realize it. He drives me mad.


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## empericalbeauty (Feb 19, 2007)

sometimes i have the same problem with my bf. It seems as thouhg he values his friends more than me, or so it seems. But then, I guess men will be men. i let him have his time with his friends and i make time with my friends so that he knows that two can play at the game. but yeah, its ****ed up when men decide to start thinking with thier ass.


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## bbprincess2147 (Feb 19, 2007)

I was just about to ask about the whole you having friends thing. It's going to be hard to manage a relationship if he has friends and you don't. You both need other outlets (other than family.)

Anyway, you know we'll all be here for you. :hugss:


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## dlwt2003 (Feb 19, 2007)

i think you should get a bunch of interests outside of your relationship. Go to the Mall, The Library, A Movie, the gym whatever but get busy, you will fill better and maybe it will make him think. Sorry hes being so rude


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## pinksugar (Feb 19, 2007)

Ugh. I hate when guys behave like that. You're not spineless. Sweets, cheer up, there is nothing wrong with wanting to stop arguing. I'm not sure what to suggest. I would have either had the most massive blow-up with him, or given him the silent treatment.

Was this the first time he did something like this? I've had bad experiences with things like this, and so I always make sure I'm really clear to my boyfriend when I don't like something, even if it's only small, or the first time he's done it, or he has a good excuse. I let him know that if he does it again then I wont put up with it.

That's just my 2 cents. I wish you all the best though, sometimes they can just be complete cocks regardless of how they normally act  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## Kookie-for-COCO (Feb 19, 2007)

Men have no way of thinking. They are the most selfish creatures on earth. Next time he wants to go with his friends--push hime out the door and act like you don't miss him--then repeat the behavior and he willwonder why you want him gone so badly.


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## tadzio79 (Feb 19, 2007)

I'm sorry hon...

obviously the situation wouldn't remedy itself until he realizes what he's doing is rude and hurting you. (and from your post it doesn't seem like he will change anytime soon since he didn't get it when you brought it up to him).

but I do agree with other posters here about having an outlet of your own other than family. Whether it be friends or hobbies or whatever, you need outlets like that to keep yourself entertained and occupied when he's out and about.


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## Savvy_lover (Feb 20, 2007)

If my bf ever does that to me. out the window he goes.


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## Harlot (Feb 20, 2007)

Well to be honest I dont see a problem. I mean, hes just going out with friends and nothing always goes perfect with time. I think that girls calling their guys ever half hour after the initial time is kinda creepy and annoying. Not to say that your suffocating him or anything like that but a little dependant, which isnt really cool to a guy. This is most likely because you dont have friends, which is reasonible, but be wary that girl dependency on a guy is what they ultimatley complain about with their friends. I rememeber seeing a chart on the what priority does a girl seem to be to a guy in some circumstances. It kind of makes sense alot but little do girls know: Their girlfriends are only their first priority at about ( if I remember correctly) 1/5 the chance. Which isnt cool for girls in general since they always want to be first priority. Well, what Im trying to say is that you may need to be a little lenient with this dude. Guys like everything simple and cool. Girls are kind of complex creatures lol


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## Shanelle (Feb 21, 2007)

What a jerk! But I think you should have your own life and group of ladies to go out with too and not always depend on him. That way you don't appear needy and spending time with him is more special.  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## Kimmers86 (Feb 21, 2007)

I would love to do something other than spend time with him...it just doesn't work. See, if I go do something then he *****es at me that I don't want to spend time with him...he's got some weird double-standard there. And yes, I do need friends to hang out with, but I don't. When I was 16 all of my friends moved away. I had 4 really good friends that I was with alllll the time. They all moved during the same summer. I had just started dating my husband when they moved, and I've gotten a little attached because of it. I live in a smile town, so I all ready know everyone and have bad history with a lot of them, so it's hard to make friends. THEN the winter after my friends moved my brother was diagnosed with leukemia. My husband was the only one I had and I'm so grateful he was there for me. My family basically moved to Utah to be at the hospital with my brother, while I had to stay home and finish high school. During that time my husband didn't see anyone but me because his friend turned into a crack addicted psycho. Now his friend isn't on crack, so suddenly everything is better and he spends time with him. Now..onto the other night. That had NOTHING to do with him spending time with his friends, that's fine. But he had plans with me, that he blew off. That's why I was upset. I understand he needs time with his friends, and that's fine. I just want him to keep his word. See my frustration? Oh, and I can't hang out with him and his friends because "they all hit on me"...so he says. See, I'm not crazy. He is.


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## Dragonfly (Feb 21, 2007)

Kimmers, you are describing your husband as a bit unstable and controlling. To me, this is not healthy. When you are in an unhealthy relationship, your partner controls you and limits who you associate with. And they decide that it is ok for them to do/say something but it is not OK for you to do the same. When you become married, he does not become the father and you do not become the child.

Are you 100% sure his friend is off of drugs or is this just what your husband says?

Please be careful that his thoughtlessness and controlling natures doesn't escalate.


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## Ricci (Feb 25, 2007)

Agreed! and if we were married Id divorce ,heres a motto ,

if he gets away with it and u apologize ,, he will continue to be late and leave u out I learned that after 16 yrs of grief


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## mmonroemaniac (Feb 25, 2007)

i know how you feel, my boyfriend used to do the same thing, i would suggest like others have said, sitting down and telling him how he would feel lif the situation was reveresed and he was sitting there waiting for you


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## Kimmers86 (Feb 26, 2007)

You are 100% correct. I know his friend is off drugs, he's living with his parents now and going to a clinic. But that doesn't change the fact that he's a jerk and I don't like him even a teeeeeny bit.

So he went out with his friends today, I pretended I didn't give a crap if he was home or not. I said bye, gave him a peck, and off he went. And funny, he called ME to tell me he missed me and he'd see me soon. I was just like "yeah, love ya, later". I think this is actually working....so if he's late or whatever, I'm going to act like I don't notice. Like I have better things to do. HAHAHA...I feel powerful LOL


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## CuTeLiCiOuS (Feb 26, 2007)

Men are f*cking stupid!

I agree :rockwoot: 

Some Men these days = too much drama:eusa_whistle: 

:handkuss:


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## KimC2005 (Feb 26, 2007)

Thats such a good feeling!! I like to purposely leave my phone where I cant get to it and then when I don't answer it seems like I am too busy to talk. He suddenly seems to miss me much more!  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## Kirsten (Feb 26, 2007)

Don't allow him to turn this on you!!. My husband was famous for that. until I put my foot down and no matter how bad he made me feel as if it was me. I did not give in. and to this day he doesn't even go there. He has learned to respect me. You have to stand your ground. Tell him to take 5 minutes ,5 hours,or even 5 weeks and get his shit together or he's going to be one lonely old man one day. It's hard but, boy did it work. good luck!!


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## Kimmers86 (Feb 26, 2007)

So true...if I don't answer the phone he always leaves a sad message like "hey babe...just calling to see what you're doin...wellll i love you *sigh*"...then he'll call back like 15 minutes later lol

He's SO good at turning it around on me! and I get so frustrated that I'm like WHATEVER you freaking win!


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## 510 (Mar 9, 2007)

yea i agree, sounds like highschool drama. guys are so immature.


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