# Do you find really thin/skinny women attractive or a turn off?



## apioollk20 (Apr 25, 2011)

Just wondering...all you lovely guys and ladies here. So many women, myself included, try so hard to maintain a good body... Hope I have the body to wear dress like this.

And lately, I'm finding myself wanting to be even thinner than I already am, and dieting accordingly. I keep seeing all these tiny girls wandering around and their clothes just look so GOOD on them...then I look at me and see yes, a slim girl, but...not slim ENOUGH.But do you people find these ultra thin girls attractive? Are we just dieting to look too thin and nobody likes it? lol PS. Be honest. I expect quite a few of you to prefer slightly more curves on a gal, but if some of you really do like the thinner ones, I want honesty even if you think it won't sound good or "supportive of natural women" or something. lol.


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## AmyNxDx (Apr 25, 2011)

I'm not going to lie, I'm sucked in by the skinny. I want so badly to like curves more but secretly I wish I was a size 3 at most, instead of 9. Most of the time the super skinny chick's clothing looks so much better. There are no muffin tops or rolls like when I try to wear certain clothes. I think I'm totally brainwashed by the media  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## Maris Crane (Apr 25, 2011)

I think some girls look really good skinny/very slender (like Nicole Richie - within reason) but others look worse when they lose too much weight. If you're naturally meatier, big-boned, or curvier, it's better to have some extra weight or fat on you. I also think the older one gets, the more careful they should be about losing weight - what use is it being skinny at 50 or 60 when your face looks gaunt and old? (FTR, I'm not referring to middle aged women who have naturally always been slender. I'm talking about the _Real Housewives_ types who continue with destructive, crash diets and have unnaturally itty-bitty bodies, but wrinkled faces due too much fat loss). I'm at the point now where I've accepted my body for what it is - it's not super-skinny, but I don't know if I'd call it big-boned, but I'm happy I can find shop where I want generally speaking, and I can find cute clothes. Generally, I'm more annoyed with my lack of height (I'm 5'1") than I am with my build or weight. I can fit into some of the more generous kids brands (H&amp;M, Old Navy, GAP Kids) which saves money, especially on outerwear (most of my coats come from the kids section!), but it gets pricey to alter shoulders and hems on women's stuff all the time. And obviously, finding non-basic stuff in younger shops that's also appropriate for a 20-something gets trying. Generally, I like a build somewhere between the modern definition of "curvy" (being fat doesn't equal curvy anymore than slender denotes boyish) and slim/slender, with good muscle tone. Elizabeth Taylor, Rihanna, Charlize Theron, the pros on _Dancing with the Stars_, Dita von Teese-types IMO, are generally more attractive to me than 5'9"/110-115lb. runway model types. It's also about proportion - skinny with a thick waist, is no more attractive to me than a more average bodytype with no discernible waist. At the same token, I also like softer, bigger meatier men. Muscles, 6-packs and bodybuilders do absolutely nothing for me, but a slender/slim build also isn't a turn-on. Somewhere on the larger side of average is generally my preference, which may also explain why I like a curvier frame on a woman.


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## magosienne (Apr 26, 2011)

Some people will be skinny no matter what while others will have more meat around their bones. Given that i think a skinny person can look good, but when they're not too skinny, if you get what i mean.

Some people, especially women, cannot stop and get skinnier to the point to me they just look like a bag of bones, and i wouldn't want to date that. I don't get that, but once i tried to calculate the number of times loosing weight before/for was labelled on the front page of a women's magazine. Loosing weight for winter, loosing weight after winter for the coming of spring, loosing weight for the beach and the bikini of your dreams, loosing weight for september when you come back from your vacation, there's always an excuse to make you loose those extra kilos you think you have.

I like curves, especially on a woman, and what i like most is a well toned body. I don't like bodybuilders but muscles are important. So i would settle for a slim and curvy figure.


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## Andi (Apr 27, 2011)

I think we have an obsession with being thin because itÂ´s becoming less and less attainable in countries were obesity is almost an epidemic. For most people (and most people are overweight statistically speaking) being a healthy size can be challenging enough. But being thin is just not possible for a lot of people if they want to do it the healthy way and not dedicate their lives to not eating and exercising nonstop. And since all you see in magazines &amp; and on TV is thin women I can understand where the obsession &amp; frustration comes from!

My obsession is a different kind. IÂ´m already naturally slim, but I am striving for that perfectly toned but not too thin look-think VictoriaÂ´s secret or Sports Illustrated models. So yeah, even though I could be happy with my figure IÂ´m still looking to improve it and get closer to my "ideal". Overall, I want to look the best I can and thatÂ´s my own personal obsession.

And to answer your question: I find a slim figure most attractive. By that I donÂ´t mean runway model-thin (they have to be thin for their job, they donÂ´t portray what everybody find attractive-I think itÂ´s quite the opposite actually!), just a healthy, slim, toned figure.


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## Carol D. (Apr 27, 2011)

I grew up when beauty icons were somewhat curvier than now, so my idea of beauty is probably a bit out of alignment with today's standards. A healthy, toned body is the most attractive to me, but a few extra pounds doesn't detract from a woman's beauty at all as far as I'm concerned, and I don't find emaciated/ very skinny women to be as attractive..


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## Ray of sunshine (Apr 30, 2011)

I think it depends. There are beautiful curves and there are beautiful slims but there are as many bad as there are good. I don't think anyone is perfectly happy with their body. I find though that if I am judging a woman's beauty, I am more interested in her hair, makeup, style and personality than I am their weight. It is all about working it!


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## AndreaRenee (May 1, 2011)

I think being skinny makes you look fashionable, but only because the fashion industry has brainwashed me to think this since day one. =x

Everyone can look fashionable though, you just have to know how to dress your body type and have a strong sense of style.

I think it's the fact that skinny people can get away with layering more, so they seem more fashionable versus an average weight person in jeans and a t-shirt.

I don't have a problem with normal skinny, but I am completely turned off/disgusted when I'm wondering if someone is anorexic.

To me anorexia equals insecurity, and generally insecure people are the worst people (will stab you in the back for someone better, or sell you out to make themselves look better/advance farther, will cheat on you cause they don't know how to deal with attention etc) sooo yeah. =/

I have an hourglass shape naturally, so I've always been attracted to pin-up style clothing and dresses. I'm forgiving of myself for having curves and I don't think I'll ever wish I was a size zero.

Even if I was like 115 pounds I'd still have big t&amp;a, which is so frowned upon in the fashion world, haha. 'You must bind your boobs down!! Look like a prepubescent boy!!'

A combination of healthy minds, healthy personalities and healthy bodies are the most attractive to me.


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## Andi (May 2, 2011)

> Originally Posted by *AndreaRenee* /img/forum/go_quote.gif
> To me anorexia equals insecurity, and generally insecure people are the worst people (will stab you in the back for someone better, or sell you out to make themselves look better/advance farther, will cheat on you cause they don't know how to deal with attention etc) sooo yeah. =/


 wow, thatÂ´s quite offensive and narrowminded. Insecurity has many faces, but it takes a lot more than just insecurity to stab someone in the back or cheat on them. Life isnÂ´t that black &amp; white.

Same with anorexia. ItÂ´s a bit more complex than that. And itÂ´s a mental disorder, so I can only guess how offensive this can sound to anyone who is anorexic or has loved ones that suffer from this illness. Please be careful how you word your opinion!


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## MakeupByMe (May 2, 2011)

I Honestly Dont think Super Skinny is Hot At all, BUT thin with big boobs n hips is Super Hot to me. Basically its not so much thin that bothers me its no Figure  I think Bodys like Beyonce &amp; Salma Hayek Are the best Ever But I also think Queen LAtifah  Looks Gorgeous   I Basically think All types are attractive Except the super Thin &amp; the Sloppy Big!!


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## AndreaRenee (May 2, 2011)

> Originally Posted by *Andi* /img/forum/go_quote.gif
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 This has been my experience with insecure people. If you'll take note I said 'generally' not everyone.

I can't remember ever meeting a kind insecure person (a flat-out insecure person, not someone with a few insecurities).

Sorry if that offends you, but I wouldn't say it if it weren't true to me.

I've gone over and above trying to help out a few people with the way they view themselves, because believe it or not I'm an extremely compassionate person, and have only ever regretted it.

And you can't deny that anorexia stems from insecurity/pressure.


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## bamboogirls (May 2, 2011)

I would have to say no for several reasons. The main one being that, when I am in a conversation about this, whether private, public or just with my husband and friends, I have not heard ONE person say that they would prefer a skinny girl over a curvy one. In my experience,  I have found that most guys like thick curvy, happy with their body women. My husband tells me I am gross if I go under 130. Sounds mean but I get where he is coming from because that is usually the only time that I become that annoying woman who is always asking if I look good in this or that or whatever. And I do that because I am grossed out by myself. There is a common misconception that if you are skinny you are healthy or beautiful and often the case is that you really aren't.  Think about all the diseases and ailments in the world that make you skinny. Hell, the common cold can cause you to drop 5 lbs.  And not to be disturbing but, when I see women that are skinny (and not just small in general) I associate it with things like that. Like illness, aids, cancer, anorexia, thyroid problems, billemia, et c.and yet there are few diseases and ailments that cause you to be not skinny. The only ones that come to mind or diabetes or a thyroid issue..  (Not saying I associate her with it, but the skinniness.)  Also, people see actress and think, "They are skinny and everybody loves them." Well, those women are usually around 5 ft tall. They aren't women with naturally big boobs or wide hips or bubble butts (which most people find adorable, i know this through the annoyance of it always being pointed out on me.) Also, they have jobs that are really demanding and strenuous on their bodies. They have personal trainers and money to pay for tailored clothes and such. They go through classes and training and yrs of practice on how to stand and move so that they are always flattering their bodies. They have great make up designers and money for plastic surgery. In other words they have a lot of help and it is kind of necessary as they are always in the spot light. But in the real world, it doesn't matter whether you are stick thin or curvy. Guys, and girls, like people who seem to be comfortable in their own skin. People who are confident and take care of themselves and don't base their opinion of beauty of someone else's opinion. Me personally, I like girls with curves but I also don't like seeing girls with better bodies than me XD you know.... Skinny is grossly misused and glorified. But if you are skinny and you rock it then I have no judgement. It is more about porportion than size and I think people forget that a lot.  Or all the time.  And don't forget, it is all just a matter of opinion. My opinion is, through my personal experiences and conversations, curvy girls are more desirable than skinny girls.


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## bamboogirls (May 2, 2011)

> Originally Posted by *Andi* /img/forum/go_quote.gif
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I both disagree with this and agree. As someone who suffered from anorexia, I get where your heart is at on this.  And it could be more complex for other people but it wasn't for me. Yes, it is mental. I wanted to eat, trust me, but I was super disgusted by food and it didn't help being the curviest (and only mixed race) girl in school but then add on to that my mothers continuous berating of herself and always finding flaws, and I was a hot damn mess. And there were tons of other things that added to it (rape, father in prison, abusive brother, older brother taken away, school problems ((people didn't talk to me unless they needed help with homework)) dating issues, stress from school work and sports and choir, being low income and having clothes that looked like i raided my grandmothers closet) so I would have to say the main cause for anorexia is insecurity. And she is right, the more insecure I am with myself, wether physically or mentally, the meaner I tend to get and I have to say, it has been the same with every insecure person I have met. What I do disagree with is that she said that we would stab people in their backs. What I have to say to that is this. I am the kindest and most giving, trusting, loving, forgiving and naive person I have EVER come across whether online or IRL. I would never and have never thought about doing something that could be considered 'stabbing people in the back'. When I say I got mean. I meant I was snippy. I pouted. I refused to hang out with people, refused to smile or eat.  Physically, it was impossible for me to eat and hold food down if I did. And I never had the idea that eating was gross or would make me fat or that skinny was beautiful. I never believed that. I just hated myself and didn't want to eat or look like me anymore. I have, however, wished I were a white girl. And my insecurity was taught, watching my mother let a pimple or visible vein or damn near invisible cellulite ruin not just her day but her week or month, sometimes even year.  Anorexia is like a form of depression.  So yeah, your statement was a bit offensive but at the same time, I get that mindset now that I am healthy and vuluptuous at a comfortable 135.  And I have to add, thank god for my children because without them I think I might have starved myself to death, literally. They are my life. They healed me in ways I didn't even know I was hurt. I love my family and my amazing husband who slaps my ass, humps me in his sleep and tells me I am gorgeous a million times a day despite whether I am 180 lbs or 119. ( I have been both and beyond) You are the best.


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## CharmedImSure (May 7, 2011)

I'm *5'10.5 and a size 2* (model body) and it depends on the outfit really all in all.  If I wear 1-2 sizes too big on the top, I feel like a pile of bones and I get lost in the mess.  but if I wear too tight or too short, I feel I come across as big (big as in I'm too tall) 

But I am torn really about being tall and thin....I think society/media tell us that the only way tall girls can be beautiful is to be thin.  If we are a bit heavier or on the curvier side, we are considered

bordering masculine/man-like (one case Khloe Kardashian)........so although I wish I was a bit more curvier I also like being thin..

of course this is all different for shorter girls....


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## SassyAuburn (May 7, 2011)

Wow, it's funny that I stumbled upon this topic.

Yesterday, while on a field trip to Boston with my daughter for art, I stopped at a rest stop to pick up a magazine to read on the bus. When I opened it up, the models I saw displaying the looks for that month looked SOOOO skinny to me.  I, myself, am 5'9" in bare feet and weigh about 120. The thing is, I don't TRY to be that thin. I just am. It's how I'm built, it's family genetics, and at times I wished I weighed more. I have medical conditions which sometimes can make me lose 5# in an instant. I always have to watch what I eat because not only does it have to be healthy (because of the illnesses that I have) but it also has to contain enough calories to sustain the weight I am.

I get "ripped on" by many of my friends. I get called "the skinny witch" or they'll say "Oh you are SOOO lucky you're so skinny." I wish the modeling industry would step away from the OVERLY skinny models. I think it gives girls--my daughter's age, for example--the wrong idea about what is attractive. I like to see some "meat on their bones"... even if I'm not that size! I EMBRACE with a magazine shows ALL sizes of girls/women. Because, honestly, isn't that what we are???  ALL SIZES??  

There isn't a normal.... there isn't a perfect. There is a YOU, and every YOU should be the size that is the healthiest (most important) and happiest for you. Be the best YOU that YOU can be!


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## Bonnie Krupa (May 7, 2011)

> Originally Posted by *SassyAuburn* /img/forum/go_quote.gif
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> I wish the modeling industry would step away from the OVERLY skinny models. I think it gives girls--my daughter's age, for example--the wrong idea about what is attractive. I like to see some "meat on their bones"... even if I'm not that size! I EMBRACE with a magazine shows ALL sizes of girls/women. Because, honestly, isn't that what we are???  ALL SIZES??


I really wish they would too.  Even the rail thin girls get photoshopped to be skinnier.  It puts so much stress on girls who try to achieve the impossible.  I actually suffered from an eating disorder for almost 10 years and what I saw in magazines and movies etc was def part of the problem.


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## CharmedImSure (May 7, 2011)

Btw I don't know if you guys noticed, but Nordstroms.com is featuring a lot more plus-sized models....So I guess the model either has to be rail-thin or plus sized these days?


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## MakeupofDesire (May 8, 2011)

> Originally Posted by *Maris Crane* /img/forum/go_quote.gif
> I think some girls look really good skinny/very slender (like Nicole Richie - within reason) but others look worse when they lose too much weight.
> 
> If you're naturally meatier, big-boned, or curvier, it's better to have some extra weight or fat on you. I also think the older one gets, the more careful they should be about losing weight - what use is it being skinny at 50 or 60 when your face looks gaunt and old? (FTR, I'm not referring to middle aged women who have naturally always been slender. I'm talking about the _Real Housewives_ types who continue with destructive, crash diets and have unnaturally itty-bitty bodies, but wrinkled faces due too much fat loss).
> ...



I am a BBW and am so due to medical reasons.  I was told by my doctor that even if I was to be on a 500 calorie a day diet, I would still gain weight!  I think curvier girls look healthier and seem happier.  I'm not happy being as big as I am, but I don't want to be a size 3 or anything like that. I'd be happy being a size 12!  It would be nice to be able to shop in a store other than made for plus size only. But I'm happy and part of that happiniess comes from my wonderful husband that reminds me each and everyday how beautiful and sexy I am.  And that's all that matters to me!  I, too prefer guys with some meat on their bones. I'm not attracted to buff, muscle bound guys.  It's a turn off to me. I like my guy to be a bit bigger than average build.  Just more fun and comfortable to cuddle with and ...you get the idea.  So, I too, prefer curvier frames on both men and women.  It just looks more natural and comfortable.  The media is terrible at brainwashing the public.  If the health of the person is at stake, due to their weight, then there is a problem. Other than that, let them be just who they are.


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## Yukiko (May 8, 2011)

I don't. Well, thin is fine, but when I can see a ribcage, then that is where I say it is more disgusting than it is attractive. Sorry to the girls here that do, but really, it isn't a pleasant sight for me. =(


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## Carol D. (May 8, 2011)

To be honest, I don't see any of those models as being really plus-size. There's only two who look just a little bigger to me, top row, second from left and bottom row, second from right, but they don't really look like what I think of as being a plus-size, and all of them are gorgeous, IMO. Even though many businesses sell plus-size clothing, it seems that most of them don't use plus-size models in their catalogs or on their sites. One of the sites that does use plus-size models is *Torrid .*

When I'm thinking of models who are too skinny, I'm talking about being skinny to the point of looking like one is starving to death, like Stephanie Naumoska,  Miss Universe Australia of a couple years ago who stirred up a controversy for being too thin, *click here* for an article about her. In the photo in the article, she looks so thin to me that she doesn't look healthy. However, I've known a few people who are just naturally that thin, so I don't know if she worked to be that thin or if it's natural. If she's naturally that thin, that's fine, but I don't think it's good to put her in the spotlight as being the ideal figure, which is pretty much what beauty pageants do. 



> Originally Posted by *charmander* /img/forum/go_quote.gif
> 
> 
> Btw I don't know if you guys noticed, but Nordstroms.com is featuring a lot more plus-sized models....So I guess the model either has to be rail-thin or plus sized these days?


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## ivette (May 8, 2011)

women shouldn't go to one extreme or another. i'd say try to find a happy medium. i like the fact that a curvy body is seen as a positive and not a negative.


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## Maris Crane (May 9, 2011)

> I'm *5'10.5 and a size 2* (model body) and it depends on the outfit really all in all.  If I wear 1-2 sizes too big on the top, I feel like a pile of bones and I get lost in the mess.  but if I wear too tight or too short, I feel I come across as big (big as in I'm too tall)
> 
> But I am torn really about being tall and thin....I think society/media tell us that the only way tall girls can be beautiful is to be thin.  If we are a bit heavier or on the curvier side, we are considered
> 
> ...


 As a member of the Munchkin Brigade, I don't think it's much better. Snooki is too fat (I personally find 'fat' in her case to be an overstatement), while 'too' small (whatever that is) and short looks pre-pubescent. I'm by no means anywhere near as small as some of the really diddly girls, but I do think there's a tendency amongst some folks to infantilize shorter women. I always appreciate a compliment, but it comes off a little condescending to be called 'cute' or 'adorable' by an SO, or date. I'm not witching (well, maybe I am a little), and I'm generally okay with my height, but like taller women, I do feel that short people also can't win.


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## divadoll (May 9, 2011)

I don't see where the plus size is.  These look like average women that you'd see walking down the street.  Even these women are skinny compared to those you see walking down the street.  According to an American Demographics journal article in July 2003: The average woman is 5'4" tall, weighs 145 lbs. with a dress size of 11 to 14, has a 36-37" bust, is about 29" around the waist and close to 40" around the hips. 
 



> Originally Posted by *charmander* /img/forum/go_quote.gif
> 
> 
> Btw I don't know if you guys noticed, but Nordstroms.com is featuring a lot more plus-sized models....So I guess the model either has to be rail-thin or plus sized these days?


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## Andi (May 9, 2011)

> Originally Posted by *divadoll* /img/forum/go_quote.gif
> 
> I don't see where the plus size is.  These look like average women that you'd see walking down the street.  Even these women are skinny compared to those you see walking down the street.  According to an American Demographics journal article in July 2003: The average woman is 5'4" tall, weighs 145 lbs. with a dress size of 11 to 14, has a 36-37" bust, is about 29" around the waist and close to 40" around the hips.


 These models are plus sized in modelling terms, which doesnÂ´t translate into what we think of plus sized. Just like petite models, who are rarely short enough to ever be considered petite in the real world. ItÂ´s just terminology.

But even plus size models donÂ´t look like the "average" woman on the street, they still have to be tall, with a well proportioned figure and a gorgeous face.


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## CharmedImSure (May 9, 2011)

by the way, I didn't mean to imply that all of those models in my computer snapshot were plus-sized, I just took a random snapshot of the Nordstroms online, because I've been shopping online forever and just happened to notice them including bigger sized girls there..
 



> Originally Posted by *Carol D.* /img/forum/go_quote.gif
> 
> To be honest, I don't see any of those models as being really plus-size. There's only two who look just a little bigger to me,


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## CharmedImSure (May 9, 2011)

> Originally Posted by *Maris Crane* /img/forum/go_quote.gif
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## ls820 (May 9, 2011)

i'm not a big fan of ULTRA thin girls. i have realllllly lanky arms and it's impossible for me to put on arm fat. i have a lot of curves. i don't know whether to smile or cry when people tell me i'm a rake just because i have skinny arms. I don't find ultra skinny girls attractive at all, i had a lot of model friends and it kills me when they refuse to eat cake... or anything considered 'fattening". I don't think it's attractive when you can see their rib cage sticking out.....


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## MichelleMUA (May 16, 2011)

Honestly:

I envy the skinny skinny girl. I have given up on going that direction &amp; have switched over to eating healthy &amp; trying to tone up what I do have. I am curvy &amp; I've lost a lot of weight since childhood. The fact that my 3 sisters are all 90-115 pounds...it is always in my face that I could look like them too if I starved myself. I delt with eating disorders for 10 years. Sometimes you just have to see the light. I almost RUINED my life trying to be tiny tiny. More important things in life than ideal beauty. I think I may always have a little tiny bit of envy for the girls that can wear anything &amp; have big gaps between their thighs. But I refuse to ruin my body &amp; starve &amp; risk my health to become one of them...so I exercise &amp; try to eat right &amp; am learning to love the body I have.


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## SassyAuburn (May 16, 2011)

I think this is a subject where many different opinions will show through. My daughter is as cute as a bug in a rug to me. At 16 y/o, she is 5'9", 140# and looks good. Sure, she has a little "muffin top", is totally aware of it, and knows it is because she eats things she shouldn't and doesn't exercise as much as she should. But if you ask her?.... she'll grab her mid section, yell that she's fat, and cringe if she needs any size jeans bigger than a 9.  I NEVER say anything about her size or weight. Her doctor says she's health, blood work is fine, and just encourages good eating and working out. All her friends are on her case that she's soooo skinny. She's fine. Perfectly healthy and attractive as all heck. In some ways I'm envious of her that her weight is in her control, where, like some of us, it's a medical condition that controls our size.  Whereas some people would love to hear "Oh my heavens, you are so thin! You lucky thing!", when I hear the words "Look at you... you are so skinny!!" I want to cry and hide in a closet.

Everyone has different attitudes, metabolisms, and mindsets about their size. It's a subject that there is no right or wrong. But it is one that will be discussed from here on out in our society.


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