# **The Official Mother in Law Support thread**



## Aprill (Jun 4, 2008)

This thread is for all us ladies (and gentlemen) That have a mother in law that drives them wild. Post your rants, your past experiences, do you love her? do you hate her? Do you all get along at all?

I will post mine soon (super long).


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## Anna (Jun 4, 2008)

mines psycho. PSYCHO. i wont go on about her today cause it'll make me mad. next time she aggervates me i promise i;ll post


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## SqueeKee (Jun 4, 2008)

Woot Woot! This thread is much needed! I will post soon too  /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />


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## GlossyAbby (Jun 4, 2008)

Mine would take too long to post. Luckily she has gotten a lot better! I have a book called toxic in laws its a great read!


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## Ashley (Jun 4, 2008)

LOL! Cute thread!

I don't have a mother-in-law, but my BF's mom is pretty nice. Her fashion sense is a bit kooky for me, but other than that, she's pretty normal!


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## Ricci (Jun 4, 2008)

This is creepy.. my mil by common law hates me with a passion, why? she actually doesn't have a reason lmao!!

couple of years ago told her we were having our 6th yrs anniversary and she screamed at me you both haven't dated that long

then walked off .. i was stunned..

she can go to hell

good thing my fiance dont care for her that much anymore since she decided to hate me

lmao her loss and she keeps saying how lonely she is ohh boo hoo waaa


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## Aquilah (Jun 4, 2008)

Lord, I wouldn't even know where to begin! Aprill, you know all about how crazy my MIL is... I wouldn't wish her on anyone *BUT* my worst enemy!!!


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## Adrienne (Jun 4, 2008)

I don't think any one of us will have really short post to say about our mil's. I've got too many stories that i swear i could sell a book: i live with mine





The most recent one that made me mad is that she's my babysitter (naturally) and i swear she's so lazy but i put up with it since my next closest babysitter would add another 35 mintues to my already 30 minutes drive to work. My son is very choosy in his food, well not really but he'll say he wants something and then not want it. Typical kid. Well he's going on 3 in august and he's hit another growth spurt. When me and my husband got home after going out with gio(son), after we had already eaten, she starts asking, "did he eat? he's getting too skinny, why is he so thin?" Now i can assure you my son eats anything and everything.

She kept on saying that he's too thing and seems malnourished or something. Then she said "Well, i don't know whats wrong with him, he only eats when he's with me." Now that literally blew off the lid for me becuase she was basically insinuating that i don't feed my son. I breastfed him for 13 months (weaned him that last month; let me know when you can find a 17 year old that will do that nowadays) and always made sure that he got his meals and had food with his babysitter. Apparently, mil thinks that I'm too stupid to figure out where his mouth is so that's what i snapped back. I told her, "Oh really! That makes sense! All this time I've been shoving food up his behind and wondering why nothing ever stayed! He's been my son for almost 3 years, i think i know how to feed him." and went to our room.

In general, we're nice to each other but she's a very gullible woman and very narrow minded. She doesn't discipline my son at all. He'll throw something at her and she'll just tell him that if he doesnt stop, she'll spank him. I'm not one to hit but the only cir***stance i will do it is if he hits me or throws something at me or does something that is completely off limits (tries to mess with outlets, tries to run away at the parking lot, throws his car at me, tries to hit me when he gets mad.)

Alright, i think i'll stop here bc its making mad just thinking about it. Rant over...for now...


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## Aprill (Jun 5, 2008)

Originally Posted by *Adrienne* /img/forum/go_quote.gif I don't think any one of us will have really short post to say about our mil's. I've got too many stories that i swear i could sell a book: i live with mine




The most recent one that made me mad is that she's my babysitter (naturally) and i swear she's so lazy but i put up with it since my next closest babysitter would add another 35 mintues to my already 30 minutes drive to work. My son is very choosy in his food, well not really but he'll say he wants something and then not want it. Typical kid. Well he's going on 3 in august and he's hit another growth spurt. When me and my husband got home after going out with gio(son), after we had already eaten, she starts asking, "did he eat? he's getting too skinny, why is he so thin?" Now i can assure you my son eats anything and everything.

She kept on saying that he's too thing and seems malnourished or something. Then she said "Well, i don't know whats wrong with him, he only eats when he's with me." Now that literally blew off the lid for me becuase she was basically insinuating that i don't feed my son. I breastfed him for 13 months (weaned him that last month; let me know when you can find a 17 year old that will do that nowadays) and always made sure that he got his meals and had food with his babysitter. Apparently, mil thinks that I'm too stupid to figure out where his mouth is so that's what i snapped back. I told her, "Oh really! That makes sense! All this time I've been shoving food up his behind and wondering why nothing ever stayed! He's been my son for almost 3 years, i think i know how to feed him." and went to our room.

In general, we're nice to each other but she's a very gullible woman and very narrow minded. She doesn't discipline my son at all. He'll throw something at her and she'll just tell him that if he doesnt stop, she'll spank him. I'm not one to hit but the only cir***stance i will do it is if he hits me or throws something at me or does something that is completely off limits (tries to mess with outlets, tries to run away at the parking lot, throws his car at me, tries to hit me when he gets mad.)

Alright, i think i'll stop here bc its making mad just thinking about it. Rant over...for now...

That really stinks!!!!!!!!!!


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## brewgrl (Jun 5, 2008)

my mother in law likes to call herself a feng shui consultant, when in all honesty she's only read a couple of books and throws her own mumbo jumbo on top of it. it bothers me because my uncle, who is a practicing heart surgeon, used to go on month-long sabbaticals to China to study under a Grand Master.

i hate that crap.

oh- she's all about anything metaphysical, from any culture... you know- waving crystals over your head, watching the Secret, interpreting dreams.... blechhhh


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## pinksugar (Jun 5, 2008)

I was thinking about this the other day.

All my ex's mothers have been a little on the crazy side.

Just once I would like my bf's family to like me. It's really important to me, and hopefully my next relationship will be better in that regard!

One of my ex's mums told me that the whole family hated me, that they thought I was rude, that I'd never marry her son and they couldn't respect me because i didn't go to a private school. I figured the relationship was over when the bf didn't defend me, even though he was sitting right there.


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## brewgrl (Jun 5, 2008)

How could anyone say that about you Rosie? that is beyond me...

I was thinking about my husband.. and between the two of us, I think his Mother in Law might be worse, hahaha

my mom comes to live with us for a few months of the year when she's in the US. She likes to rearrange our dishes, and feels no issues with going into the closet to borrow stuff. She is also the smartest person I have ever met, and the smartest person almost everyone I know has met- and she's uses it to feel superior.

oh- and she cant ask my husband a favor directly- she goes through me, even if he's right next to me.


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## Andi (Jun 5, 2008)

Wow, those are some crazy stories. MILs from hell!!!

I can honestly stay my future mother in law is awesome. SheÂ´s funny, openminded, has a big heart and she loves me. I was so relieved that sheÂ´s not the clichÃ© MIL. I can honestly see myself calling her "mom" in the future, whenever IÂ´m married to her son.

When she met me for the first time she didnÂ´t know Shawn and I were already engaged. I even took my ring off when I was around her, we didnÂ´t want it to be too much at the first time...kinda like "hey mom, this is Andrea. SheÂ´s from Austria and btw weÂ´re engaged too".

When we were on the plane after the stay Shawn got a text message from her that said "I just wanted you to know that Andrea is a wonderful young lady, I already know she will be my future daugher in law one day. IÂ´m very happy to have her in my family". That made me cry soo bad, it was just so sweet.


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## SqueeKee (Jun 5, 2008)

Aww that's so sweet Andi! You're very lucky &gt;.&lt;


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## Adrienne (Jun 5, 2008)

You're so lucky Andi!!! Now, my mil does love and i love her too and our relationship has actually caused tons of tension between me and my other sister in laws who are older and get jealous bc she favors me so much. (hey,don't blame me bc you're never around), but when you have to live with her, omg, things can sometimes just topple over. The only thing that keeps me sane is the fact that our room is basically almost separate from the house. The back porch was torn off and created into a huge bedroom and it has its own door that leads to the outside. That way i dont have to see mil even when i get home!!


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## CellyCell (Jun 6, 2008)

LOL, Clarisse is gunna love this thread. I'mma link it to her. Haha.


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## MakeupByMe (Jun 6, 2008)

UGH My bf of 5 yrs / my kids grandmother is actually reall nice I just Can't Stand her she's old school &amp; Dumb she's one of those "Work ALL DAY, come home start cooking, serve everybody seconds B4 she even eats, will drop whatever she's doing at the drop of a hat if her husband says or if anybody is hungry only speaks spanish no mind of her own" type of Woman!!!!! &amp; she thinks her sons can do whatever they want &amp; their Girlfriends are supposed to be waiting around all day at home takin care of kids all day.....because whatever the man says goes.......F That!!!!!!!! ugh his parents ae the biggest hypocrites ever Thay go to church alot &amp; try n tell everybody whats right /wrong n how to make a family work etc etc they try to judge me for having tattos or being too outspoken or whatever PLEASE my BF is (yes I'll admit a G &amp; has been in jail) their other son has tatto's &amp; has sold drugs their other son well, he's good but still I hate ppl who judge as if they are so perfect!!! ughwere not really even together anymore as of a few wks ago but whatever im good but will still have to see them &amp; of course I'm sure they think its my fault!


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## SqueeKee (Jun 6, 2008)

That's one crazy woman!!!!

I still haven't gotten the courage to write out all my issues with the MIL, and we've gotten better in the past few months!!!


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## macface (Jun 6, 2008)

Originally Posted by *MakeupByMonet* /img/forum/go_quote.gif UGH My bf of 5 yrs / my kids grandmother is actually reall nice I just Can't Stand her she's old school &amp; Dumb she's one of those "Work ALL DAY, come home start cooking, serve everybody seconds B4 she even eats, will drop whatever she's doing at the drop of a hat if her husband says or if anybody is hungry only speaks spanish no mind of her own" type of Woman!!!!! &amp; she thinks her sons can do whatever they want &amp; their Girlfriends are supposed to be waiting around all day at home takin care of kids all day.....because whatever the man says goes.......F That!!!!!!!! ugh his parents ae the biggest hypocrites ever Thay go to church alot &amp; try n tell everybody whats right /wrong n how to make a family work etc etc they try to judge me for having tattos or being too outspoken or whatever PLEASE my BF is (yes I'll admit a G &amp; has been in jail) their other son has tatto's &amp; has sold drugs their other son well, he's good but still I hate ppl who judge as if they are so perfect!!! ughwere not really even together anymore as of a few wks ago but whatever im good but will still have to see them &amp; of course I'm sure they think its my fault! OMG WE CAN RELATE FOR THIS.


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## brewgrl (Jun 6, 2008)

I do love my MIL too.. I mean- if my only issue with her is her trying to interpret my dreams and talk about energy in a room in the wrong context, than i am cool with that.

I am also her favorite as well, definitely over the sissies in law... even over my husband (i don't think she's ever taken his side in an argument)...

Like I said- he has the worst end of the deal with the MIL's... My mom ALWAYS takes my side.


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## pinksugar (Jun 6, 2008)

oh man, I feel sorry for my future hubster in that regard... haha my mum has already packed up most of the ex's stuff and put it in a big pile ready go to, even though she suggested I take time to think about his offer to get back together. Yeah, right, I can see what you really think about that!!!


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## XkrissyX (Jun 8, 2008)

OMG.

I just found my thread for life.

hhahha

I have a love and hate relationship with my MIL.


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## S. Lisa Smith (Jun 8, 2008)

Originally Posted by *pinksugar* /img/forum/go_quote.gif oh man, I feel sorry for my future hubster in that regard... haha my mum has already packed up most of the ex's stuff and put it in a big pile ready go to, even though she suggested I take time to think about his offer to get back together. Yeah, right, I can see what you really think about that!!! Golly, who's side is she on?


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## Anthea (Jun 9, 2008)

I am most lucky to have a good MIL. Just for the record I am officially separated (4 or 5 years) but still married, one day I'll get a divorce when I get around to it.

Without going into specifics my ex and I had a child custody battle though the courts. The courts well know that I am transgender and it was a major topic in the proceedings. In my case the MIL supported me though this time against her own daughter. Its most unusual and there are reasons for it that I cannot discuss here. I am very lucky for her understanding of my TG nature (she did research on it) and I see her on a weekly basis as I make sure my son has regular contact with his grandmother.


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## Aprill (Jun 9, 2008)

Originally Posted by *Anthea* /img/forum/go_quote.gif I am most lucky to have a good MIL. Just for the record I am officially separated (4 or 5 years) but still married, one day I'll get a divorce when I get around to it.
Without going into specifics my ex and I had a child custody battle though the courts. The courts well know that I am transgender and it was a major topic in the proceedings. In my case the MIL supported me though this time against her own daughter. Its most unusual and there are reasons for it that I cannot discuss here. I am very lucky for her understanding of my TG nature (she did research on it) and I see her on a weekly basis as I make sure my son has regular contact with his grandmother.

That is very nice!!!!!!


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## La_Mari (Jun 9, 2008)

My MIL doesn't bother me. When we talk about my Thomas, she tells me about his dad, and they are so alike! I'm so glad she's there.

There was a time last year where I was irritated w/ her. We had just moved in to our first real apartment, and had to buy everything for ourselves, all of our appliances/furniture, which was fine. Our place wasn't cluttered cause obviously we haven't ac***ulated as mush stuff as you would over 20 yrs. So when they visited a couple weeks later she kept mentioning what we _DON'T _have. She would say "Oh, you guys forgot to get a ....." or "I'll take you to buy a ....."

Thomas knew she was getting on my nerves and told her we would rather have a simple apartment and we didn't need certain stuff.


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## Ricci (Jun 9, 2008)

My SO wont have anything to do with his mom until she apologizes to me in person

which she never will anyways

I love how he is supported that way


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## Jessica (Jun 9, 2008)

Great thread aprill!! My MIL is a little nutty but she's nice to me. The only thing is we don't agree on certain issues like politics, religion ( she says she's a devout catholic but NEVER goes to church for confession, communion...etc.) and she is homophobic. Wich to me is fine, everyone has their own opionion and I respect that but she's knows my brother is gay and always says... ewww thats so gross and the biggest sin. Oh and she believes the devil makes people gay....LMAO!! I just ignore her for my husbands sake. Now my FIL thats a whole different story. Lets just say he can be the biggest @$$#^&amp;*. He's always right.... ALWAYS (thinks he knows everything).

Well you can choose your partner but not your in-laws...lol


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## Aquilah (Jun 29, 2008)

I have officially HAD it with my MIL! OMFG! She called here asking me to get out my blender so she can use it to make the kids' lunches this week. Now, a normal thought would be, "WTF is she planning on feeding them?!" All I said was, "It's glass, and I don't want it getting broken."

So, she of course asks me how it would get broken. And I tell her I have no idea, but I do know I've had two knives go missing, as well as various other kitchen/cooking utensils. She tells me she has NO idea where the knives went to, and I need to talk to my 10 y.o. about it!

Bullsh*t!!! I know for a fact those things haven't gone missing while Cyera was home, and she retorts with, "Cyera gets home before you do!" Okay, fine. That means my MIL is STILL the one home with the kids, and should still know what's going on. Right?! My daughters don't play with my kitchen stuff, and my MIL has already told on herself in saying she'll blame Cyera for whatever she can. OMFG!

I swear, as soon as summer is over, the Kylie's going into a pre-school somewhere, and I'll make arrangements for Cyera to go to a friend's house before and after school. Hell, considering my in-laws upped the rate we have to pay, I might as well pay the additional $30 a week for a real childcare center! UGH!


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## La_Mari (Jun 29, 2008)

Crazy. ^ btw your girls are so beautiful! I remember a pic you posted a while back.


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## Aquilah (Jun 29, 2008)

Originally Posted by *La_Mari* /img/forum/go_quote.gif Crazy. ^ btw your girls are so beautiful! I remember a pic you posted a while back. Crazy is about the only word for that woman. I keep telling John, he better hope she goes before I have to be the one to take care of her. Otherwise, it's either a nuthouse or nursing home, and I WON'T be visiting either way you cut it!
Thanks chica! I appreciate it. They're little terrors at times too though LOL!


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## Gwendela (Jun 29, 2008)

After my son was born he had to spend a week in the nicu. My il's volunteered to care for our two older children since the nicu was in a different city. They had them for a week and not once did they bathe them. My girls begged for them to run water so that they could bathe and they never once did. They also wanted to leave my two children who are both in grade school alone for over two hours. I will be polite and not speak ill of them around my children but I will NEVER forgive them nor will I EVER trust them with my children again. They neglected them and that is inexcusable.

Originally Posted by *Aquilah* /img/forum/go_quote.gif I have officially HAD it with my MIL! OMFG! She called here asking me to get out my blender so she can use it to make the kids' lunches this week. Now, a normal thought would be, "WTF is she planning on feeding them?!" All I said was, "It's glass, and I don't want it getting broken." 
So, she of course asks me how it would get broken. And I tell her I have no idea, but I do know I've had two knives go missing, as well as various other kitchen/cooking utensils. She tells me she has NO idea where the knives went to, and I need to talk to my 10 y.o. about it!

Bullsh*t!!! I know for a fact those things haven't gone missing while Cyera was home, and she retorts with, "Cyera gets home before you do!" Okay, fine. That means my MIL is STILL the one home with the kids, and should still know what's going on. Right?! My daughters don't play with my kitchen stuff, and my MIL has already told on herself in saying she'll blame Cyera for whatever she can. OMFG!

I swear, as soon as summer is over, the Kylie's going into a pre-school somewhere, and I'll make arrangements for Cyera to go to a friend's house before and after school. Hell, considering my in-laws upped the rate we have to pay, I might as well pay the additional $30 a week for a real childcare center! UGH!

That's ate up. Tell her that for what your paying her she can buy her own blender. Sheesh what is she going to make them for lunch margaritas?


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## Aprill (Jun 29, 2008)

OMG Gwena what?


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## Gwendela (Jun 29, 2008)

Originally Posted by *Aprill* /img/forum/go_quote.gif OMG Gwena what? Yes it's for real. When they walked in the door of my house the first place they went was to the bathroom. I threw their underwear away. Then I proceded to cry for the next few weeks.


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## Aquilah (Jun 29, 2008)

Originally Posted by *oobladi* /img/forum/go_quote.gif After my son was born he had to spend a week in the nicu. My il's volunteered to care for our two older children since the nicu was in a different city. They had them for a week and not once did they bathe them. My girls begged for them to run water so that they could bathe and they never once did. They also wanted to leave my two children who are both in grade school alone for over two hours. I will be polite and not speak ill of them around my children but I will NEVER forgive them nor will I EVER trust them with my children again. They neglected them and that is inexcusable.
That's ate up. Tell her that for what your paying her she can buy her own blender. Sheesh what is she going to make them for lunch margaritas?

OMFG! I can't believe they didn't even bathe them! They're in grade school, it's not even hard to let them wash themselves off!
Yeah, they jacked their rate up $20 a week for gas. Excuse us? I don't recall John or I getting a "cost of gas went up" raise! And she does have her own blender, she's just too effin' lazy to bring it over to use. I seriously cannot stand the woman. I don't even feel as if "hate" is too strong of a word to use in this case!


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## Aprill (Jun 29, 2008)

Originally Posted by *oobladi* /img/forum/go_quote.gif Yes it's for real. When they walked in the door of my house the first place they went was to the bathroom. I threw their underwear away. Then I proceded to cry for the next few weeks. I would have beat someone up, thank god they didnt get sick or get some sort of infection or rash. That is f'ed up


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## Gwendela (Jun 29, 2008)

Originally Posted by *Aprill* /img/forum/go_quote.gif I would have beat someone up, thank god they didnt get sick or get some sort of infection or rash. That is f'ed up I wanted to tell his parents exactly where they could go and how they could get there but I let my husband handle it. I only heard part of the conversation and what I heard wasn't pretty at all. I told my sil what happened (she is the one that intervened when she found out they were planning on leaving the girls alone) and she cried about it she felt so bad.
Eeeeek I think I killed this thread.


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## kdmakeuparts (Jul 8, 2008)

MIL's are like rolling the dice.

I got lucky. Now, bare in mind my in-laws beliefs are completely opposite of ours. From religion to politics. But we are lucky enough that they don't force beliefs or make comments or "suggestions" in those areas. I do see myself having a conversation with my FIL in the the future regarding terms he uses for certain people and lifestyles, as those words are not ok for me and my children.

That being said I adore my MIL. When I had both of my children they came out and stayed for like 10 days. I cried when they left!

They never try to tell us how to parent and they always help around the house. Also when they are here they refuse to let us pay for anything, gas, groceries, dinner.

They adore their grandchildren and spoil them, but never do anything without making sure I am ok with it.

It does make me sad to think of some of the things they believe. I love them and they are so sweet, how can they honestly think that way.

Anyway, in most cases they are the best!


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