Secret Santa 2014 input wanted

[kawaiimeows]

I really think this notion that we have to photograph and document every little thing to a T is a side effect of blog/social media/instagram culture. If Secret Santa is going to be this rabid about it, then I'm having serious second thoughts about participating in the future, because I get busy and don't get around to photographing things quite frequently, especially around the holidays because I have to travel a lot.

 

[SaraP]

I don't *think photos are needed, this site is a pain in the rear end to post photos on!! I think a short "Thanks so much! I loved the xyz items" is not overly hard.

 

[SOSRedAlertSOS]

I really think this notion that we have to photograph and document every little thing to a T is a side effect of blog/social media/instagram culture. If Secret Santa is going to be this rabid about it, then I'm having serious second thoughts about participating in the future, because I get busy and don't get around to photographing things quite frequently.

I'm sure that you are right about this but like you, my SS didn't post pictures of her reveal either. So no one was fawning over my gift, and who cares. Like I said, I just wanted to know that it all arrived safely. I took very concentrated photo's of my gift because I am busy as well but I felt that my FGM deserved the acknowledgment for the amazing gift she had sent, even if it was only in a few photo's.

 

[kawaiimeows]

I'm sure that you are right about this but like you, my SS didn't post pictures of her reveal either. So no one was fawning over my gift, and who cares. Like I said, I just wanted to know that it all arrived safely. I took very concentrated photo's of my gift because I am busy as well but I felt that my FGM deserved the acknowledgment for the amazing gift she had sent, even if it was only in a few photo's.

I think that's fair but there has to be some kind of definitive and reasonable rule, because in Donna's words "Maybe you can't force people to be active participants but you can make them post a reveal or be disallowed further participation." and as you can probably tell I am not comfortable with a rule that strict.

 

[SOSRedAlertSOS]

To me, I think the biggest cause of nerves or issues for givers in a swap is "is my person going to like her gift", at least it was for me. I don't care a WHOLE LOT about regular posting (I was lucky enough to get someone who posts so maybe I'm just optimistic) but I think it would be beneficial to make the requirements 1) you need to fill out a survey when you sign up. If you have the time to post in a thread that you want to do it, you have time to shop, and you have time to ship, I am confident you can find 10-15 minutes to fill out a survey. This way your buddy has at least some guidance if you never post again. Don't fill out the survey? (Maybe even make it pretty basic like 10 questions of "I like this, I hate this, here's what colors I like, then other optional questions for more details) you ain't signed up. Make the survey part of the sign up process. 2) no reveal or acknowledgement of receipt? you are not allowed in future swaps. Reveals are the fun part and I get how hurt someone could be if their gift wasn't acknowledged. You're super shy? PM your buddy and say you got it. You hate your gift and think your buddy is a mega weenie? PM a mod so at least they can let your buddy know it's received.

Just my two cents on what may help alleviate some stress for people.

I totally agree that the survey should be apart of the sign-up process, you should have to submit it even before the sign-ups begin.

 

[BSquared]

I think making the rule "you must somehow acknowledge you received your gift" would make people happy.

I also think this won't be that much of an issue. Summerswap reveals haven't started but there like what 2-3 people that haven't recognized their buddy in midsummer? For the VAST majority of swappers this rule wouldn't even be an issue.

 

[SOSRedAlertSOS]

I think that's fair but there has to be some kind of definitive and reasonable rule, because in Donna's words "Maybe you can't force people to be active participants but you can make them post a reveal or be disallowed further participation." and as you can probably tell I am not comfortable with a rule that strict.

That's definitely a strict rule because even though it's 2014, some of us don't have camera's or phones with a camera capability. I do think that a more reasonable requirement would be for the the giftee to be acknowledged by the gifter within 24 hours of the tracking showing delivered.

 

[kawaiimeows]

That's definitely a strict rule because even though it's 2014, some of us don't have camera's or phones with a camera capability. I do think that a more reasonable requirement would be for the the giftee to be acknowledged by the gifter within 24 hours of the tracking showing delivered.

I think that is a good start but I would probably expand it to 48 or 72 hours *only* because I know a lot of people travel during the holidays and I could see a lot of people freaking out about not being able to notify their SS *immediately* so that might save whoever is moderating mass PMs of people panicking.

 

[meaganola]

I think making the rule "you must somehow acknowledge you received your gift" would make people happy.

I also think this won't be that much of an issue. Summerswap reveals haven't started but there like what 2-3 people that haven't recognized their buddy in midsummer? For the VAST majority of swappers this rule wouldn't even be an issue.

One thing to keep in mind on this:  Everyone who signed up for Midsummer participated in one of the 2013 Secret Santas, so there was some awareness of the expectation surrounding reveals when they signed up.  That won't necessarily be the case for Secret Santa.

 

[SOSRedAlertSOS]

I think that is a good start but I would probably expand it to 48 or 72 hours *only* because I know a lot of people travel during the holidays and I could see a lot of people freaking out about not being able to notify their SS *immediately* so that might save whoever is moderating mass PMs of people panicking.

And this would play off of the idea that people would post vacation dates as well, so as long as they have publicly mentioned that they will be out of town, if their gift arrives then, it's reasonable for this period to be extended to 48-72 hours.

 

[SaraP]

I think that is a good start but I would probably expand it to 48 or 72 hours *only* because I know a lot of people travel during the holidays and I could see a lot of people freaking out about not being able to notify their SS *immediately* so that might save whoever is moderating mass PMs of people panicking.

I think 48-72 is better then 24. As the sender I'd want it asap, but that's not always feasible. 

 

[DonnaD]

I really think this notion that we have to photograph and document every little thing to a T is a side effect of blog/social media/instagram culture. If Secret Santa is going to be this rabid about it, then I'm having serious second thoughts about participating in the future, because I get busy and don't get around to photographing things quite frequently, especially around the holidays because I have to travel a lot.

But you did.  I very specifically remember you being VERY involved in the ss thread and oooing and awwwing right along with the rest of us.  I'm calmer and not so angry now but I really am baffled by your input here.  It's completely the opposite of the way you were in the ss thread.

You made that thread extra fun for me to the point where I adopted you as a ninja santa.  I loved you on that thread.

What changed for you?

 

[bonita22]

I'm sorry if I'm "egotistical" for wanting my fgc to post her reveal or at least aknowledge it was received. I put a lot of time and energy into her gift. She didn't even acknowledge she received my gift for days even though she logged in everyday. I was beginning to think it was misdelivered or stolen. She did send me a message eventually and I'm ok with it.

Just because you don't care about reveals doesn't mean the rest of us don't care and are egotistical because we do care.

 

[kawaiimeows]

But you did.  I very specifically remember you being VERY involved in the ss thread and oooing and awwwing right along with the rest of us.  I'm calmer and not so angry now but I really am baffled by your input here.  It's completely the opposite of the way you were in the ss thread.

You made that thread extra fun for me to the point where I adopted you as a ninja santa.  I loved you on that thread.

What changed for you?

You're right, and I wasn't speaking about myself personally, and I also remember your SS and like I said earlier, I do think its incredibly rude that she didn't thank you. I also think your SS experience falls in to an "extreme" of members who aren't the typical SS participants. I don't remember seeing anyone with a SS as silent as yours. That's one reason why I don't think a strict rule should be instated.

Which leads to my second point, my SS didn't post a lot, and I still had a completely pleasant experience with her. She didn't post pictures of the gifts I got her, but she was extremely gracious about it and even messaged me a few months ago about how she still loves a particular polish I got her, even though she still doesn't post much. I believe chat threads are fun, but I don't believe people should be required to participate because I may not have gotten the SS I received if there were rules about posting vs not posting. I'm not ok with potentially scaring off lurkers/introverts.

 

[kawaiimeows]

Also as an addendum: making a rule saying "you must thank your gift giver upon receipt" could come off as very abrasive, but requiring that people contact their gift giver within a certain amount of time to let them know the package arrived, like @ and @@SaraP suggested, would help open that door to thanking/conversing without it being so forced or weird.

 

[DonnaD]

A reveal doesn't have to be pictures.  I stand by my assertion that a public acknowledgment needs to be a rule.  Even if your person thanks you in private, there are a lot of other ladies in the threads who'd like to know who your person was and that they're happy.

The bottom line is that it's sad and disheartening for those of us who get lurkers, the painfully shy or insensitive jerks as our recipients.  And since they don't seem to be the majority of people, a rule isn't going to have people fleeing the "oppressive rules" in droves.

 

[Dashery]

*peeks in* Hey, um, can I suggest we let this issue rest for the night (or longer)? Maybe it would be best to let the dust of the two current swaps settle, and then come back and evaluate the issue again later.

I just worry this thread is starting to go in circles.

Deep breaths, friends!

(Ɔ˘⌣˘)(˘⌣˘)˘⌣˘ C)

 

[kawaiimeows]

Even if your person thanks you in private, there are a lot of other ladies in the threads who'd like to know who your person was and that their happy.

 
I understand where you're coming from, but we will have to just agree to disagree on this one. 

 

[tacehtpuekam]

Well, this escalated quickly. 

 

[kawaiiwoofs]

Also as an addendum: making a rule saying "you must thank your gift giver upon receipt" could come off as very abrasive, but requiring that people contact their gift giver within a certain amount of time to let them know the package arrived, like @ and @@SaraP suggested, would help open that door to thanking/conversing without it being so forced or weird.

I totally agree with this. I think a private acknowledgment should be more than enough.

I get that it would suck to have a shy/less frequent poster. But, I would keep my upset feelings to myself until maybe after the swap itself was completed. I think if I was a less frequent poster, got my present, did some recon and saw that for weeks my my Santa complained about me and had a miserable time because of me and was open about it, I would only feel the incentive to bless her heart and move on with my life.